Life, 1908-10-01 · page 16 of 44
Life — October 1, 1908 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
## "Just Words" — The Man from Mars Dialogue This satirical piece uses an extraterrestrial visitor to mock American political discourse, particularly targeting Democrats and Missourians. The joke hinges on the Man from Mars's literal-minded questions about what a "Democrat" actually *is*—exposing that it's an empty abstraction with no concrete meaning. References to "Bryan" (likely William Jennings Bryan, Democratic presidential candidate) and searches through "lower right hand vest pocket" suggest Democratic politicians are morally compromised or corrupt. When the Missourian dismisses tariff reform discussion as talking about "the dead," it implies the Democratic party itself is defunct. ## "The Work That's Unpopular" This section critiques David Blaustein's defense of Jewish immigrants against Police Commissioner Bingham's crime statistics. The author sarcastically suggests Jews' intellectual pursuits over manual labor create antagonism, implying they exploit others' labor—a period antisemitic stereotype. ## Minor pieces mock British adoption of American slang ("to the good") and report a rabies tragedy.
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gilt bl J eks Just Words . HAT do you mean by a Demo- crat?"? asked the Man from Mars, after listening to a spirited argu- ment “Tt depends on where you are from replied one of the disputants. “Where are you from?" asked the Man from Mars. “I'm from Missouri show ti “But I cannot show you. I'm a stranger here from Mars. What is a Democrat? ”” “You can search me.” You have to answered the Man from Missouri. “If it can be carried around in the clothes, it must at least be portable, I take it," ventured the Man from Mars. “You might find it by searching Bryan,"’ rejoined the Man from Missouri. “Try his lower right hand vest pocket.” “T would imagine you were joking,” said the Man from Mars. “ What does the Democrat party stand for? “ Because it can’t sit down, although it has been repeatedly knocked down.’ “You are given to cheap levity, I see, Are all the Mis- sourians thus afflicted? “Not at all,” joke about jokes. objected Man from Missouri. “I only Iam very serious when I talk about serious matters."” “Let us talk about serious matters, then—tariff reform, for instance,"’ proposed the Man from Mars. o, no,"’ said the Man from Missouri, as he turned away. ou can't say thing good about the dead, keep quiet."" hese Missourians must be a queer race," mused the Man from Mars. Ellis O. Jones. The Work That's Unpopular D" DAVID BLAUSTEIN, formerly at the head of the Educational Alliance, and for years prominent in educa- tional and philanthropic work among the Jews of the East Side, denies General Bingham’s statement—since modified— that the percentage of crime is vastly higher among the Jews than among the members of any other nationality in New York. In speaking of the physical unfitness of the Jews, Dr. Blaustein says: “Of the older Jews this is to a certain extent true. For reasons that I cannot go into now they were compelled to work with their minds to the neglect of their bodies.”” And they are still doing it. They find more profit in trading on the results of other people’s labor than in using their own muscles. Does this help to account for the antagonism they seem to have inspired in all communities since history began? The New Régime PEAKING of the reception of our fleet in New Zealand, the London Daily Mail says: * All this enthusiasm is to the good.”* This is an interesting commentary on a great event, for it indicates, more than in any other way, the Americanization— as a critic has recently pointed out—of the British. And it is to the-language that we must first look for confirmation. The phrase “to the good” is strittly American, so far as anybody knows. That it is used with such ease and elegance, in commenting upon our naval evolutions, by an English paper, is a striking illustration of our influence. We shall expect soon to see Mr. Andrew Lang talking George Ade, and in his latest Homeric criticism saying “ Was Achilles on to Agamemnon'’s game? Did he give him the frozen face for nothing? When Briescis was piped off by the king of men, was Achilles laying down and being fanned by the umpire? No, sir! Achilles was all to the good.”” On With the Tragedy [SPEctaL DESPATCH TO THE HERALD.) Sreixcrieto, ILt., Sunday.—Fearing that he would be the victim of hydrophobia because he had been bitten by a squir- rel that was suffering from rabies, Fred Peterson, forty years old, ended his life last night. Mr. Peterson was one of seven victims of the little animal. The others are hurrying to Chicago to the Pasteur Institute. V ILY, the “ Scientists’ and the Pasteur Institute are having a hydrophobial debauch! Are all the unmuzzled squirrels now to be killed? And how about the unmuzzled children? The bite of a child, you know, is just as fatal as that of any other vicious animal, such as a dog, a squirrel or a bird. Has anybody figured up the deaths of nervous humans and honest dogs from this summer's hydrophobia scare? Trovble Agrees With Him Mr. Roosevelt always has trouble when he mixes up in’ military atters.—Columbis (Ge.) State. HAT's why he does it. Trouble is meat and drink to him. He grows fat on it. In Their Earlier Years PETROLEUM V. NASBY, MARK TWAIN AND JOSH BILLINGS.