Life, 1908-08-20 · page 14 of 22
Life — August 20, 1908 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces typical of early 1900s *Life* magazine humor: **Main Story (top)**: A domestic comedy about Mr. and Mrs. Splicer. The joke concerns beauty standards and marital devotion—she demands he accept her if she gains weight again, and he dramatically agrees. The satire targets both changing female body ideals (the era's obsession with slenderness) and performative male devotion. **"Another Case of Hydrophobia"**: A news item followed by editorial commentary. A dog kicked into the Hudson, later bites a boy, gets shot. The satirist argues the *dog* was justified in biting—it learned from being mistreated. The humor is sardonic social criticism: the dog acted rationally given experience, unlike humans who expect animals to be forgiving. **"Medical Maxims"**: A cynical list mocking doctors for diagnosing wealthy patients with fashionable ailments (neurasthenia, gout) while giving poor patients stigmatizing diagnoses (insanity, delirium tremens)—and prioritizing wealthy patients' survival for payment. **"The Limit"**: A brief joke about despised professions—baseball umpires, insurance presidents, or Republicans supporting Bryan (likely William Jennings Bryan). The cartoons illustrate these satirical pieces with simple line drawings.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
196 -“LIFE* “Ido.” “Say that you will be mine.” The contemplation of Mrs. Splicer’s divine figure was driv- ing her husband into a fine frenzy. “You must go. It is time for me to punch the bag.’ “Oh! Won't you take me back? Suddenly she turned and clasped him almost savagely by the hand. “On one conditio “Any.” “1 will come back to you if you will let me grow fat again; if you won't reproach me when you sce me eating what I please; if, when I begin to waddle once more, you will still follow me obediently and devotedly around ; if, when I quiver like a jelly, you will kave no other eyes than for me, no matter how fat I get; if you will love me just the same as you do now. And Mr. Splicer, his face brimming over with the most unutjerable devotion, as he clasped her in his arms replied : “Darling, I will, I will! So long as I know you could if you would, it is all I care for. Let the world jeer at you, it matters not. Henceforth I am yours forever. You may go as far as you like.”* TLL. M. Another Case of Hydrophobia A bulldog strayed onto a North German Lloyd Line pier in Hoboken yesterday, and a man kicked him overboard. "As soon as the animal got out of the water a watchman chased him with a stick, and he ran into the yard surrounding the residence of Capt. Max Moeller, superintendent of the piers, at 209 River’ strect. William Mocller, the ca fourteen-year-old son, attempted to drive him out, andthe excited dog attacked the boy, biting him in the knee and’ the hand. Dr, William. T.. Kudlich ‘cauterized the wounds and ordered the youth sent to the Pasteur Institute in New York City. for treatment. The dog was shot by Policeman Dick Winters.—Daily Paper. F Policeman Dick Winters had shot the man who kicked the dog overboard there would have been a glimmer of justice in this affair. And if the dog, after his recent ex- periences, had not bitten the first human who approached him he would have been not only an incredibly trusting dog but one who could not learn by experience. However, it may all be for the best. It furnishes the A FLORAL SUGGESTION (Johnny) : D BETTER WALK AHEAD, MERE. COMES A KID THAT OWES ME A NICKEL.” Pasteur Institute another authentic case of hydrophobia. And the dog's agony was shorter than if he had fallen into the hands of a vivisector. Medical Maxims F the patient is poor, it's a crime; if rich, a disease. Discrimination pays. Diagnose for the rich neuras- thenia, brainstorm, gout and appendicitis; for the poor insanity, delirium tremens, rheumatism and gall-stones. Finally, fatten the thin, thin the fa stimulate the depressed, depress the stimu- lated; cure the sick, sicken the cured; but above all, keep them alive or you won't get your money. The Limit “HERE goes one of the most despised men in the county.’” “What is he—a baseball umpire, insurance president, or Republican who is going to vote for Bryan?"* ATERER: How was that ice cream we de- livered to you yesterday? Patron: Fine. It was the best ice cream I ever drank. comicbooks.com