Life — August 20, 1908 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

a a lc The Man Who Didn’t Know M« and MRS. SPLICER were people who never went anywhere in par- ticular. They were, indced, so much oc- cupied with each other that they didn’t feel the need of outside resources. When Mr. Splicer married Mrs. Splicer she was a delicate little affair. The wind—if the wind had been so minded—might easily, no doubt, have blown her away. But married life had agreed with her, and now But that will come later. [o Mr. Splicer she was exactly the same as she always had been, He saw in her no change. She was the loveliest, sweetest—and so forth—creature in the world It was not, therefore, because Mr. Splicer specially cared for it, that they decided to take a little outing. But Mrs. plicer declared that she was played out, which was, of course, a sufficient reason The morning atter al they were sitting on their hotel piazza. A number of ladies in the near tance were disporting themselves. Some were playing tennis; others, equipped with golf bags, were strolling toward the links. Mr. Splicer looked them over rather carefully, and then turned to his wife. “My dear,’ he said, “ how slight they look !* “Do you really think so?’ replied Mrs. Splicer. “I was afraid you might think them—well, about right."" ear, no. Now, you, you “Oh, my di are—plump—I should say—plumy At this moment they were joined by Mrs. Planer, a lady whose acquaintance they had made the night before. “Mr. Splicer,”” said Mrs. Planer, “I have been trying to persuade your wife that she must be one of u Mrs. Splicer gave Mrs. Planer a ing look, but it was lost. “I'm sure she would be delighted,”’ said Mr. Splicer, answering for her. “Just what do you mean?"* “ At banting.”” Banting?” Yes. You see, we women all have to do that now—that is, most of us— and she needs it—sadly !"” Mr. Splicer turned to his wife. Such a thought had never occurred to him before. “Needs to bant,’” he repeated, as he gazed at her. “ Why, I never thought of it, but—weli—perhaps if you were a trifle thinner” A trifle!’ exclaimed Mrs. Planer. “Why, she needs to take off thirty pounds at least. My dear, you mut be- gin at once."" Mrs. Planer indicated the tennis court “You sce Mrs. Wilmot over there, she said. “Isn't she perfectly lovely Did you ever see anything more sylph- like? She used to be quite stout. Her hushand didn’t realize it. He was ac- customed to see her every day. The arn- change was so gradual that he didn’t notice it. She turned to the now intensely inter ested Mr. Splicer “He was just like you," she said, sweetly, “until—he woke up. I must run along. I've got to walk ten mile Left alone with his wife, whose face plainly showed her perturbation, Mr. Splicer turned and looked at her in- tently. Then his eyes caught the sylph- like figure in the tennis court, and other sylph-like figures near. A great truth began suddenly to dawn on Mr. Splicer. “ My dear,”’ he said, “ perhaps you are a trifle stout. I hadn't thought of it be- fore."” Mrs. Splicer betrayed her chagrin. “I'm sorry you don’t like me,"” she exclaimed. “ But I do, of course. Only’’—— He laid his hand on her arm. “A little exercise will do it.” “T hate exercise.” “Then dictin: “I'm not going to diet. I think you are horrid to suggest such a thing Didn't we come here because the table was so good? '’ Mr. Splicer dared say no more. But that evening at dinner he watched his wife out of the corner of his eye, as he noted her extensive orders. And the next morning, when she was asked to YOU KNOW TIE COURSE OF TRUE Lov MAKOLD, EVEN NOW SOMETHING TROURLE IS— EVER RUNS SMOOTH, TELLS ME THAT