Life — July 9, 1908 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

gl Jnieslege THE KING LAUGHED A curious court story went the rounds some little time ago about a lovely forzigner, one of whose verbal slips gave King Edward occasion for a hearty laugh. A very. lively personage, with a delightful accent, she made such a favorable impression upon the King that he asked her to be his partner at bridge. “But, sir,” she sai really don't know bow to play.” The King would take no denial, however, and she became rather em- barrassed. “I assure you, sir," she said, ‘*I could not think of playing. I doa't know the difference between a king and a knave.” There was an awkward silencezand then she realized | what she had said and was covered with confusion. The of course, laughed it off, and now tells the story with gusto— Dundee Advertiser. “Din Tom have any luck bunting tigers in India?’ How “He didn’t meet any tige You are Corptatty Inviten to use Delaware atoga Springs, Lake C real. Send 6 cents postage for illustrated resort guide. A.A. Heard, G. P. A,. Albany, N.Y. HER RESPONSIBILITY REALIZED Mrs. J.’s patience was much tried by a servant who had the habit of standing around with her mouth open, One day, as the maid waited upon the table, her mouth was open as usual. and her mistress said * Mary, your mouth is open.”* “Yassum,"" replied Mary ; ‘I opened it."—Philadelphia Ledger POOR CAB HORSE CamMan (201th exaggerated politeness): Would you mind walk ing the other way and not passing the horse? Sroct La 10 has just paid the minimum Jare): Why? "Because if 'e sees wot ‘e's been carrying for a shilling ‘e'll ‘ave a fit." —Pick-Me-Up. Asnevitte, N. C.: The four-season resort of the South. Tur Mason, the English like Inn of Asheville. BY INFERENCE The magistrate looked severely at the small, red-faced man | who had be-n summoned before without flinching "So you kicked your landlord down, J you imagine that was within the rights of a ten n, and who returned his gaze id the magis in and show it to you," said the little man, “and I'l wager you'll agree with me that fen to prohibit in that lease I had a right 1 very first good chance I got."—Youth's Companion. CRAMPED Sreita: Can you dress within your income? Betta: Yes: but it is like dressing within a berth in a sleep ing-car.—Harper's Batar. “Tar D. & H." 19 rae Aprroxnacks —Through Pullmans night and day trains, 2 cents postage for illustrated folder. A. A. Heard, G. P. A, Albany, N.Y. New York office, 1354 B'way BUSINESS “Good morning,” said the claim agent, cheerfully, to the pa tient with a broken leg and head in bandages. “I have good news for Yes, sir. The company feels sorry for you. It is willing to forgive and forget. Soulless? Why, man, it's all soul. Ready to pay about five thousand ?"" ‘no, not exactly that. But I am authorized to sign its agreement not to prosecute you for letting yourself get thrown on the right of way and blocking rush-hour traffic." —Philadel phia Ledger. Jack: The horse I backed for the Belmont Stakes led for half the course, and then turned around and bolted for the starting post. Eva: But why didn’t you back him both ways?—Town and Country. GREAT BEAR SPRING WATER “Its parity has mado {it famous.” While Rock. “The World’s Best Table Water” The Hit of the Hour “Richard's Poor Almanack,” beautifully bound and illustrated humorous book, sent Jor 10¢. Address White Rock, Flatiron Building, N.Y. A name to swear by—not at |S eemmeetete: GOLF BALL It stands for durability, distance, direction A perfectly balanced golf ball Price, 50 cents The B. F. GOODRICH COMPANY AKRON, OHIO Some of the people who wear American Hos- ery Underwear. We can not mention names, but— A well known statesman, The president of a great transcon- tinental railway, The vice-president of a great New York bank, The proprietor of a metropolitan newspaper, The head of one of America’s wealthiest families, One of the largest land owners in America, A director of the largest manufac- turing concern in this country, One of our greatest philanthropists, (Nine Hitkest Awards) ~ UNDERWEAR For men, women and children, Wholesale Dept., 108 Franklin St., New York A WOMAN’S CONFESSIONAL By HELEN WOLJESKA Pittsburg Dispatch: “The tragedy of a life told in epigrams. Grave they times cynical and often hitter, but always with a note of and thea a smothered sob. St, Paul Dispatch : ‘There is intense patho in this oddly conceived journal. reveal a nature in hot rebellion against the artificialities of ¢ and gay, some- ance—and now The epigrams fation—a pas. sionate soul that wished to make her own laws, to live her life in all its pagan purity of thought and deed. Albany Times-Union : Through these epigrams one can trace the growth of a human soul. They run the entire scale of human emotions. It is scarcely ever that a woman's mind and heart are thus laid bare. Los Angeles Times: ‘The journal of a keen, independent mind. Full of originality. Full of fine, beautiful, strong thoughts. Chicago ) ‘The pentest of an exuberant life against the cold conventions of existing codes ‘The utter frankness, sincerity and aptness of expression certainly make the little volume interesting reading. 75 Cents LIFE PUBLISHING CO., 17 West 3let Street, New York HARTSHORN: SHADE ROLLERS Bear the script name of ‘Stewart Hartshorn on label, Get “Improved,” no tacks required. Wood Rollers Tin Rollers 8 Clark’s Cruises 3 “Arabic” tc2° Feb. 4, Orient; Oct. 16, ’09, Feb. 5, ’10, Cruises Round the World. Fall Tours, Round the World. F.C. CLARK, Times Building, New York The n For And T The D oO Ew Ew lected The s conscien But the be carri tem, T ing and The The in should b ing. Th comicbooks.com