Life — March 19, 1908 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“OUR FOOLISHa GNTEMPORARIE ON THE TRAIN. When sitting by the window, I Watch the tall poles go racing by, And wonder why they hurry so To leave the place to which I go. ‘The words upon the wires, too, T often wonder what they do When several meet and try to pass. Do some fall off and die, alas? And then those rows of puffed-up birds! T know they eat the little words; For when the tel-e-grams arrive Only big words are left alive. Harper's Monthly Tne Sovrn roe Hosprrautry: The Manor, Asheville, North Carolina, is the best inn South.— Booklet. AS NEAR AS HE DARED A couple of New Yorkers were playing golf on a New Jersey course on Election Day when they saw a fine-appearing old gentleman looking at them wistfully. They asked him to join the game, which he did with alacrity. He was mild in speech and manner and played well. But once when he had made a fooale he ejaculated vehemently the word: “Croton!” A few moments later when he had made another bad play, he repeated “Croton!” ‘The fourth time he said this, one of his new-made friends said: | “Ido not want to be inquisitive, but will you tell me why you say *Croton’ so often?”* “Well,” said the old gentleman, pear New York?" He was a Presbyterian clergyman from Brooklyn. —C teeand | | Plain Dealer Ina pinch use Allen's Foot Ease “isn’t that the biggest dam Areavreire, finding that he had a couple of hours in Dublin, called a cab and told the driver to drive him around for two hours. At first all went well, but soon the driver began to whip up his horse so that they narrowly escaped several collisions. | “What's the matter?" demanded the passenger. ‘Why are you driving so recklessly? I’m in no hurry, “Ab, g'wan wid yez,” retorted the cabby. “D'ye think I'm goin’ to put in the whole day drivin’ you around for two hours! Gitap!"—Philadelphia Ledger THE MOST SUSPICIOUS EVER Henry Clews, the banker and author, was talking at the Club in New York about a certain financier. ] id Mr. Clews. “He is the most careful, the most suspicious fellow I ever heard of. In fact, he reminds me of a Staflordshire farmer my father used to tell of “It was said of this farmer that, whenever he bought a herd of sheep, he examined each sheep closely to make sure that it had not cotton ia it."—Washington Star A BARGAIN A Paris shopkeeper wrote to one of his customers as follows “Lam able to offer you cloth like the inclosed sample at nine francs the metre. In case I do not hear from you I shall con- clude that you wish to pay only eight francs. In order to lose no time, I accept the last-mentioned peice."—Demacratic Telegram No wonder the man is so successful,” Currcyaax: So this is your boy, is it, Mrs. Jones? Mrs. Jones: Yes, sir. Step up and give the gentleman your right hand, Tommy Mr. Jones (the heavyweight champion) : "Ere, stow it, spoilin’ the kid. Remember what I told you, sonny—always lead off with yer left! London Opinion “Tis man’s business must not be interfered with," declared the political boss. “Aw, he’s only an American.” ‘hat's all right. No discrimination goes in my ward.” Ne Courier-Journal. EAT BEAR SPRING WATER purity has made it famous.” CI a i th is at his merriest, jolliest best right now in Why not take a trip out there this Winter? For booklets on California write Union Pacific \s.SouthernPacific ok L. LOMAX, Gen. Pass. Omaha, Neb. to the Laundry? COUNTRY CLUB Made in 3 Heights low Many Trips HARTSHORN SHADE ROLLERS Bear the script name of ‘Stewart Ilartshorn on label, Get “Improved,” no tacks required. Wood Rollers Tin Rollers No. 1 1% No. 2 21g No. 3 235 ou can get good arog vhand made collars at two fora quarter— with perfect style and fit. But you must remember to ask for Collars. be5¢ ‘The best men’s shops almost every. where sell Cor! ra. If not willingly supplied eer eend. us 2c. for any ‘two collars you would lil We want tosend you our atyle book showing all the latest shapes. Free on request, Corliss, Coon & Co., Troy, N. Y. Dept. J HOTEL ST: FRANCIS JAMES WOODS. Manager SF Facing a tropical park, Seni chits the civic center of an Francisco,has the unusual’ aspect of an old-world square or Spanish Plaza,this hostelry -marks the farthest advance of science in hotel service. Rates (European lan)> - ooms - -$ 29° upward » with bath 23° upward Parlor, bedroom abat from$l0°° upward SAN FRANCISCO comicbooks.com