Life, 1908-03-19 · page 17 of 24
Life — March 19, 1908 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
## The Cartoon ("St. Moses's Day in the Morning") This satirical cartoon depicts a crowded street scene of Irish-American immigrants or working-class people, with signs referencing poverty ("We are in poor"), establishments, and social commentary. The artist appears to be mocking Irish-American urban life and stereotypes. ## The Poems **"The Sophistries of Blarney"** is a humorous poem about an Irish pilgrim and a young woman (Sheila) at the Blarney Stone in Ireland. The pilgrim uses increasingly absurd logical arguments to convince Sheila to kiss him by claiming it's morally acceptable if done "by proxy" through the stone first—essentially using mock-theological reasoning to justify physical contact. The satire ridicules both flowery Irish rhetoric and the sophistry used to justify romantic/sexual pursuits. **"Hesitation Overcome"** is a brief satirical joke about upper-class debutante social life, mocking wealthy young women's reluctance and their dependence on servants and family to manage their social obligations.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
\ve “ye ROPES ‘ic \ Nor SOON \ \ BUT Now \ \ ST. MOSES’S DAY IN THE MORNING The Sophistries of Blarney N IRISH pilgrim wand’ring far by Antrim, Clare, Killarney, By murmuring rill and misty hill, rested one day at Blarney, And watched the lovers climb the steps to kiss the stone of story, Whose magic touch gives eloquence, success in love, and glory. There was his young heart filled and thrilled by Sheila’s charm * and beauty, Who came to kiss the Blarney Stone with lips red, ripe and fruity. “Oh, Sheila, fair,” the pilgrim cried, “why waste such precious treasure Upon a hard, unfeeling stone which knows nor pain nor pleasure!” “Surely,” quoth he, “no sweeter thing this ancient stone e’er tasted; Surely no sweetness ever was so scandalously wasted. Fair spendthrift, pause; avoid the stone; such kissing would be sinning, When men were made for maids to kiss and maids were made for winning.” “Tis mortal sin to kiss a man, and maids must guard securely Their hearts and souls from men and sin,” the maid replied, demurely. “Why kiss a stone,” the pilgrim sighed, “if your swect orthodoxy May be preserved and your soul's peace be kept intact—by proxy? “Let me the kiss from your lips take and sacredly transplant it To this historic Blarney Stone, and there may I decant it; Or I will kiss the Blarney Stone and its strange magic sip And piously transfer it thence to your receptive lip.” Fair Sheila blushed and said, “ Perhaps, the soundness of your logic Would not appeal to minds skilled in the wisdom thcologic. Yet kissing done by proxy might its wickedness condone In one who's travelled weary miles to kiss—the Blarney Stone.” “Dear, weary one,” the pilgrim cried, “when maids are hesitating, A kiss's guilt or innocence is hardly worth debating; I will admit, if you'll permit a labial demonstration, If there be sin in kissing you tis guilt-edged osculation; But all alone to kiss a stone, ancient, rain-drenched and grimed, Would be a sin to cry to heav’n, uncalled for and ill-timed.” “Ah, well,” she sighed, “if guilt consists in kissing all alone, I'll save my soul and kiss the man who kissed the Blarney Stone.” Joseph Smith Hesitation Overcome # AX? the débutante daughter comes out reluctantly, does she?” “A little.” “Do tell me: how do you manage to get her started?” “T hold the cab door open, and my wife spits on her hands and takes a running start down the hall, and so we get her in. Then at two or three o’clock a maid brings her home.” “QPEAK every day to some one whom you feel is your superior,” urged her confessor. “Yes, but supposing all the servants have left?” interrupted the society woman. comicbooks.com