Life — January 2, 1908 — page 41: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“The first Derby made in America was a Cok. Hats for Men NAPP-FELT hats are the re- sult of fifty years P/ % search for the best. , Vs’ The C. & K. shop was Ve making fine hats twenty- five years before the first copy of “Life” appeared. Knapp-Felt DeLuxe hats are Six Dollars. Knapp-Felts are Four Dollars—everywhere. Tux CroruT & KNAPP Co. BROADWAY. AT THIRTEENTH ST.. NEW YORK 2 CRUISES uring February and March by the magnificent . Oceana—to the WEST INDIES, NASSAU VENEZUELA, PANAMA CANAL 7,000 miles—23 days—$150 and upward. HAMBURG-AMERICAN LINE yw Terk, Bestes, St. Lovie, Chicago, San Francis AClub-Cocktail = S "THOUSANDS have discarded the idea of making their own cocktails,—all will after giving the CLUB COCKTAILS a fair trial, Scientifically Blended from the choicest old liquors and mellowed with age make them the perfect cocktails that they are. Seven kinds, most popular of which are Martini (Gin tase,) Manhattan (Whiskey bate). The following label appears on every bottle t Guaranteed under the National Pure Food and Drugs Act. Approved June 30th, 1906. Serial No. 1707. G. F. HEUBLEIN & BRO., Sole Props. Hartford New York London Wa quent: se A DOLLAR BILL Otto's Auto IS passing strange how fashions change in things that men admire; Our muse that sang the tireless stecd now sings the stecdlcss tire. Friend Otto got an auto, su as not to secm antique, But the thing was autocratic just as much as automatic, And that au.o woukdn’t auto as it ought to, so to speak. He sought an auto operator who should make it work; A circus man at first be tried, and then he tried a Turk. For he knew the circus man drove fifty horses with success, “And if a mau be shifty,” reasoned he, “so manage fifty, ‘Tis manifest that he’s the mn to manaxe one horse-less! “The Turk, p'r'aps." pondered Otto, “Leing bern an Ottoman, Ought to awe thie awkward auto on the Oriental plan.” Twas all ip vain. So off he went to Alabama, merely ‘That he might sav, "I'm Otto of Mobile, and my motto— “A Mobile Otto's sure to tame an automobile, cleatly.'" ‘There Otto wrought to auto on that auto as he ought to; But the auto sought to auto as Otto never thought to. And Otto fought the auto, and the auto it fought Otto, ‘Till the naughty auto got too hot to “aut” or to be taught to, And while the air was fraught with Otto's oaths (not voce sotto). ‘The auto shot to heaven with a haughty sort of snort, oh! Where Otto steers his auto now, an austere aeronauto. —Tit- Bits Keeping a Cook “ HAT you laughing at?” grumbled Carleton C. Crane, all in one word, as he straightened up, red in the face, with a handful of clearing house certificates recovered in fragments from the New York Central waste-basket, into which he had cast them, thinking they were cigar coupons. ot at you,” chuckled John A. Gill, soothingly. “This letter here’s from an old friend of mine, Captain Hutchinson, an Englishman living down at Lindsay, near Porterville. He's the man that planted the first orange sced that raised the first orange blossoms for the first marriage ceremony ever performed at Lindsay. Listen tot “*Gave my Chinese cook, Ah Lui, his regular check for fifty dollars. He took it to the bank. All they’d give him was five dollars in cash, rest in certificates. He came back, threatened to throw up his job; fine cook, too; had him a long time. “All lite, I no go, you make me one chleck flive hun dollar.” ««“Five hundred dollars, Ah Lui!” I exclaimed. “I can’t afford any such prices as that.” “No afflod. I takce chleck flive hun dollar, blank he pay me flifty dollar all same he play me flive dollar one flifty-dollar chleck.” “*So he handed me back the five dollars and the certificates, and I wrote him a check for five hundred dollars and telephoned an explanation to the bank. Ah Lui got his fifty dollars in cash, and he’s still cooking for us.’”—San Francisco Chronicle, “a Writing Paper v This Trademark on every hor. If you underrate yourself who will overrale you. A business communication, a per- sonal letter, or a social note on inferior paper instantly creates an unfavorable impression, It's good business—it's personal salisfaction—it's social diplomacy to use, for all correspondence purposes, WHITING Papers The assortment is large—the shapes are new—the sizes are right—the quality is superior. Look for the trademark on the box. Whiting is the name that signifies quality and correctness in papers for every correspondence purpose. “When you think of writing Think of WHITING.” Obtainable from all the best dealers. WHITING PAPER COMPANY 148-150-152 Duane Street, New York CHICAGO BOSTON PHILADELPHIA Mills: Holyoke, Mass. Porto Rico The special tours of The New Yotk & Porto Rico Steamship Co, occupy three weeks, and are ideal yachting® excursions on summer seas, The steamers have every convenience, with only outside staterooms. They circle the entire island and stop at many interesting and historic localities. The ship is the tourist's hotel during the entire trip, so that the labor and inconvenience of land travel is avoided. The special tourist rate for this cruise is $140, which includes every expense. Write for illustrated booklet. THE NEW YORK & PORTO RICO STEAMSHIP CO. 12 Broadway, New York, or Raymond & Whitcomb Co., New York, and all Principal Cities comicbooks.com