Life — July 4, 1907 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Life’s Little Problems A vy ELDERLY man and a woman of middle age sat together at a wed- ding reception and viewed with interest the gay and picturesque scene before their eyes. ‘They had withdrawn a little from the moving throng about them, hay- ing taken their seats in a small alcove, and thus they were enabled to continue an uninterrupted conversation. “Is she not charming?” said the woman, indicating the bride, who stood among her friends a shimmering vision of satin and lace and orange-blossoms, “and the bridegroom’s face is shining with happiness. It docs my heart good to see so estimable a young man finally marry the girl of his choice. He has long endeavored to win her.”” “If you will permit an impertinence from an old friend,” returned the elderly man, ‘what you really mean is that you admire the young woman for so effec- tively bringing down her quarry.” ‘The lady raised her lorgnon, and viewed him with cold surprise. An Oration ELLOW-ALIENS: One hun- dred and thirty (See opposite page) “T do not understand the meaning of your somewhat coarse and vulgar phrases,” she answered, stiflly. “Dear madam, a great student of human nature once affirmed, that given fair opportunities, any woman could marry any man she chose, provided she had not actually a hump.” “Absurd,” cried the lady, indignantly. “In an affair of the heart woman is a passive, not an active a; . She accepts love; she does not seek it. Why, who does the wooing? Man. By every ac- cepted standard woman is debarred from seeking attention, If she loves, she must let concealment prey like a worm on her cheek, before she dare voice her affec- tion. A woman who would ask a man to marry her isa disgrace to hersex. No,no; man alone has the right of choice. He roves about the world, and finally when he fancies he has found his soul's affinity, he secks by every means in his power to win her. I do not think that there is any other view of the question possible.” one years ago to-day was signed that inspired Declaration but for which we might be poor and, perhaps, even upright and respectable citizens [laughter and cries of or at the best but commercial for Roosevelt.”” rustics engaged in stealing stage- “L admit,” returned the elderly cynic, “that man does the wooing—ostensibly. But woman is the eternal huntress. She does not chase her prey in the open, of course. She knows subtler and far more effective methods. It is a part of her game ‘to foster in man the illusion that he is a lordly and all-conquering creature, who may pick and choose where he will. In order to add interest and to enhance her value, she surrounds herself with mythical difficulties and poses as the un- attainable, even while she is planning the details of her trousseau.”” ‘The lady shuddered and turned pale. “Your cynizisms amount to blasphe- mies,” she cried, and arose to leave hit “and your accusations against my sex are so monstrous that I refuse to remain longer in your presence.” The old man chuckled, ‘Because I dare to tell you the truth.” Which was right? The man or the woman? Do you know? Mrs. Wilson Woodrow. Slaves O THOUGHT but what obeys the rigid rule Of some ncestral molecule. that slow or (ast, cient past : HAT is he, a Democrat or a Republican?” “Democrat, I think. At any rate, I know he voted coach franchises from Indian tribes, and prostituting our genius watering livestock or selling candlelight to the farmers of Manhattan, instead of lavishing upon her happy and con- tented citizens the comforts and luxuries they now enjoy. [Deafening applause. ] Fellow-philanthropists, this is indeed a felicitous occasion. ‘The same hand of patriotism that cast off the yoke of foreign tyranny and oppression, sowed, also, the seeds of financial and Corporate power of which we are the humble and grateful harvesters. [Sobs and suppressed cries of ‘Good! Good!”] Let us be thankful but vigilant; meek, and yet not too lowly; ready | times to arm ourselves against the enemies of greed and ambition, and as valiant in asserting our inde- pendence as were the Fathers in maintaining and defending our right to life, liberty and the pursuit of lucre! Amen and a WU ~~ amen, Walter F. Rice. ; < Y ; W\ : = . mre r IS now no longer the Duma. In Russia they call it the Skidooma. o Ferner THE GUNPOWDER PLOT comicbooks.com