Life — October 25, 1906 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHAT'S THE MATTER? WHAT SORT OF MESSAGE IS HE RECEIVING ? WHY THIS DELIGHT $0 SUDDENLY FOLLOWED BY UNWELCOME News ? YOR THE BEST SOLUTIONS OF THE MYSTERY, TOLD RECEIVED BEFORE JANUARY, 1907, “ LIFE" WILL GIVE TEN PRIZES OF TEN DOLLARS BACH. NOT MORE THAN THREE HUNDRED WORDS An Unfair Exchange HE came—she smiled— She sped the dart From Cupid’s bow that Passion stirs. She went—she smiled— She kept my heart And—hers. Thomas R. Ybarra. His Intelligence “ AND do you think I am different from all the other girls?” asks the young woman who has just said “Yes.” “Not a bit, save in looks,” answers the young man who has just asked her to marry him. ‘You're a whole lot prettier than most of them and just as pretty as the rest of them.” “Do you think I have a greater mental grasp than” —— “No. I never saw but four or five women whose mentality was remarkable, and they were of the sort that goes in for mannish clothes and short hair and ugly hats. Mentally, you are on a plane with the ordinarily intelligent human being, whether male or female. I don’t suppose you have any more common sense than any other woman—women don’t require common sense.” “Do you think I am frivolous?” “Yes, indeed. You're just as frivolous as any other woman. They’re all alike. ‘They like candy and flowers and theatres —and they don’t care for literature, un- less it is a best-selling book, with gobs of love talk on each page.” “And do you think I will be a careful housewife?” “Not a bit of it. I’m not so foolish as to think that. What you save on one thing you'll spend on another.” “But do you ever expect to have any quarrels with me?” “Sure Ido. We'll spat and say unkind things to each other and get all the mean words out of our systems every so often, and then kiss and make up, and be all the better for it. In short, I expect that we'll live our lives just as every other human being does.” “Tam so glad,” she says, caressingly. “T told mama that you were the smartest man in the world, and this proves it.” The Redoubtable Moran RITICS who censure District Attor- ney Jerome for his omissions to operate the machinery of justice should make a study of District Attorney Moran, of Boston, who never lets a chance escape him. Mr. Moran is zealous to a fault. His vigilance is almost sleepless, and when it does nod it has nightmares. Where any judicious angel would decline to tread, Moran rushes in and clamors for justice. He has profited by his methods, for he has got the Democratic nomination for Governor in his State, though his prospects of election are not very serious. They will hardly be improved by his recent efforts to introduce President Roosevelt’s youthful son into his cam- paign, an effort which has afforded much entertainment. to spectators. Made Him Nervous ERDY: Why did you stop calling on the Mainchance girl? Atcy: Why, the whole family seemed too glad to see me! 'HERE are those who believe that the man to beat Bryan is Roosevelt. What about the opinion that the man to beat Bryan is Bryan! Give Brother Bill room, and let us see what he can do, comicbooks.com