Life — August 2, 1906 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Spenders F YOU happen to read, by chance, | The books of the present day— The “breathlessly strong romance” (quote from the press dope’s bray), You'll find, when the hero, say, Has a cabman to reimburse, He does it the same old way, He “flings the driver his purse.” When the heroine drives from the dance, When the villain sneaks away; When the “spirited horses prance,” “the dawn is cold and gray"; ) matter who has to pay, nge he is quite averse; legal fare? Pooh! Nay, nay! gs the driver his purse.” To He As the plots of these tales advance, ou notice with mild dismay The reckless extravagance That all of these folks display; A And the cabbies—how blest are they! Each fare, “with a muttered curse Springs out and is off”’—but, stay, flings the driver his purse.” L’ENVOL Book-cabbies! Your life is gay— I believe if you drove a hearse The corpse, though inanimate cl Would “fling the driver his pursc —Teddy Robinson in Cleveland Leader. She Was Woried Some Oklahoma people here were low in their minds to-day about an outrage or two per- petrated on that territory by the Statehood bill. One of them was making quite a fuss about it, chiming things would be all wrong, when the territory becomes a State. “Reminds me,” said Raconteur Oulahan, “ofa thing that happened in my school days. We used to have a lecture every Friday afternoon, and one day the lecturer was a geological sharp and Niagara Falls for his topic. “He told us all about the geological formation of the falls, described the different periods that could be traced in the gorge, and then went on to say that the falls were slowly wearing back toward Buffalo, and that in the course of some 200,000 years they would have worn back to Erie, Pa., and that town would be left high and dry. “Just then one of the girls in the class began to sob wildly. ‘What’s the matter?’ asked the teacher in alarm. “*Oh,’ she wailed, ‘I’ve got a'sister living in Eric.'"—Washington Correspondence New York World. How Seabirds Quench Their Thirst THe means by which seabirds quench their thirst when far out at sea is described by an old skipper, who tells how he has seen birds at sea far from any land that could furnish them water, | hovering around and under a storm~ cloud, clat- tering like ducks on a hot day at a pond, and drinking in the drops of rain as they fell. ‘They mell a rain squall a hundred miles distant, or even farther off, and scud for it with almost inconceivable swiftness.—Scrap Book. Type D, $2,800 1,800 pounds: 45 miles an hour. Four cylinders. Air-cooled. No car of its weight ever performed so remarkably, and no car of any description is so comfortable and luxurious, ex- cept a Franklin. $500-Punch-Bow! First Prize won by a Franklin The Franklin is not simply a gasolene-saver and the greatest mileage-giver, but it is in every way the most efficient of all motor cais—American or foreign ; water-cooled or air- & cooled ; one-cylinder or six-cylinder or anywhere between. 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The rpost interesting and instructive revolver catalogue of the revolver world—made published. Sent free upon request. Address Dept. A. distinctly for gentlemen's use. SMITH & WESSON, 42 Stockbridge Street, Springfield, Mass. +, Pactfio Coast Branch, 2530 Alameda Avenue, Alameda, Cal. comicbooks.com