Life — May 10, 1906 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Latest Addition to the Cruising Fleet of the Hamburg-American Line The specially equipped magnificest twin-screw S.S. OCEANA, 8,000 TONS, 17 Knots Speed WHICH WILL SAIL. From NEW YORK, JUNE 23, 1906 For SCOTLAND, ICELAND SPITZBERGEN and NORWAY THE LAND OF THE MIDNIGHT SUN ‘The Itinerary includes: Cuxhaven to Leith (Edinburgh), stay 39 hours, Kirkwall (Orkney Ilands), 4 hours. Thorshavn, (Faroe Wands), 5 hours Reykjavik, 21 hour. Sneefelle-Jokull, Staalbiers, leafjord, 4 hours. | Evjafjord, Akreyri, 5 hours. Advent Bay (Spitzbergen), 14 hours. Bell Sound, 8hours. North Cape, 6 houn. Hammerfest, + Fromsce, 21 hours, Digermulen, 9 hour, Maraak, 6 houn. Gudvangen, IZhoun. Bergen, 35 hour. Cuxhaven, and thence to Hamburg. Total dutance, 4.960 miles. Perens TS iiaters 36 DAYS — Setyiscetine $265.00 eoward Special arrangement may be made with the Company for return passage from Europe ; also to join the cruise at Hamburg or Edinburgh, if you are already booked to sail for Europe by an earlier steamer or by another line. Eleven other similar cruises. varying in duration, cost and diection by the superb steamers BLUECHER, PRINZESSIN VICTORIA LUISE and METEOR, starting from Hamburg. during Juse, Joly and August. Send for pro, HAMBURG-AMERICAN LINE Offices, 35-37 Broadway, N. Y. BOSTON, 90 State St. PHILADELPHIA, 1229 Walaut St CHICAGO, 159 Rasdolph St. ST. LOUIS, 901 Olive St SAN FRANCISCO, 401 California St. me giving further particulars to CRY: Domino| Sold only in 5b. sealed boxes! IMAGINATION COULO NOT CONCEIVE OF A HANDIER AND PRETTIER FORM THAN IS PRESENTED IN “CRYSTAL DOMINO SUGAR NEITHER COULD THE MOST PARTICULAR PEOPLE ASK FOR MORE PERFECT PURITY OR ECONOMICAL PEOPLE FOR LESS WASTE HIGHEST GRADE IN THE WORLD. ex By grocers everywhere. Gx® BEST SUGAR FOR TEA AND COFFEE. Mark Twain on Spelling Reform ARK TWAIN does not believe that the pro. ject of the Camegie spelling reformers will succeed. “It won’t happen,” he says, “and Lam as sorry asa dog. For I do love revolutions and violence.” He believes, however, that the re could be made effective if it were done “by a sud den and comprehensive rush”; but he doubts if the effort at a slow and gradual change is worth while. “It is,” hi “the sudden changes in principles, morals, religions, fashions and tastes that have the best chance of winning in our dav Suppose all the newspapers and_ periodic: should suddenly adopt a Camegian system phonetic spelling—what would happen? We all know quite well what would happen. ‘To begin with, the nation would be in a rage; it would k into a storm of scoffs, jeers, sarea cursings, vituperations, and keep it up for mo but it would have to read the papers; i help itself. By and by, and gradual sive phonetics would lose something of th strange and uncanny look; after another by by they would lose all of it, and begin to rather natural and pleasant; after a coup! years of this, the nation would think them hand- some, sane and expressive, and would prefer them to any other breed of spelling.” —Harper's Weekly. Accounted For MBBS: Me patience was much tried by a ser ant who had a hatit of standing a with her mouth open. One day, as the r waited upon table, her mouth was open as usual, and her mistress, giving her a severe look, sai “Mary, your mouth is ope! “Yessum,” replied Mary, “I opened it.”— Everybody's Magazine. Ve oe Say, pa, who was Pandora? Jousnie’s Pa: Pandora, my son, was a little girl who started a lot of trouble because she didn’t keep the lid down.—Princeton Tiger - Qsrrssy-: THE OLD TROUBLE Ted: 17 VOU LOSE SO MUCH MONEY AT THE RACES. YOU MUST PICK OUT THE WRONG HORSES. Ned: NOT AT ALL. THE HORSES 1 PICK ARE ALL RIGHT; 1) HAPPEN TO PLAY THEM ON THE WRONG DAYS. dolla of th exclu trolle pein convi admi critic Bu By th it clea that « essen: pressi able t with The noison sume that ii But th stimul tion fy ashes Prot ‘|S re “Vo Ameri¢ comicbooks.com