Life, 1905-12-07 · page 18 of 60
Life — December 7, 1905 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a humorous romantic story, not political satire. It depicts a rural courtship between two elderly neighbors, Captain Silas and Miss Mehetabel, using rural dialect and domestic comedy. The narrative shows Silas awkwardly proposing marriage after twenty years of neighborly proximity. The joke centers on their incompatible housekeeping styles: when they attempt to cook Christmas dinner together, they bicker over cooking methods—he criticizes her potato-peeling, she mocks his turkey-basting technique, he questions her bread-making. The satire gently mocks rural courtship rituals and the clash of independent household management styles. The caption "The Father of Triplets" (referring to the three cooking disputes) plays on the idea that their marriage will produce conflict, not children. The Christmas setting adds sentimental domesticity to what is fundamentally a comedy about stubborn independence meeting reluctant compromise.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A -MIONIGHT FANTASY THR FATHER OF TRIPLETS. kitchen. oe: She opened the oven, while a large, friendly, powerful odor swept out into the room and almost took the Captain off his feet. “Just in time,” she observed. shyly, “you'd like one fer your Christmas dinner?” The Captain didn’t dare refuse, “Waal, bein’ it’s your make,” he said, “I guess 1 would. Say, Miss Mehetabel, I guess I got somethin’ ter say ter “ T do believe I clean forgot them punkin pies. “Perhaps,” she added, She dropped the pie plate into the sink looked at him curiously. It suddenly dawned on her that he had on a paper collar, a thing he never had worn before, Instinctively she knew the proposal was coming—now over- due at “It’s going on nigh twenty ye: “sence we been neighbors together, ast ten years, said the Captain, nl hought—"” down, as if He looked around rather hopelessly up expecting to get inspiration from the rag carpet. “Waal, Miss Mehetabel, I thought we might help each other out by sorter bein’ together more. I could kind o° help with the chores, ’n’ then you know I'm a good cook.” Miss Mehetabel ‘patted the remaining pie on top with her fingers to assure herself that it was cooked through. Then she closed the oven door and wiped her hands on her apron. “Well, Silas,” she said, “we'll see, we'll see, but you kin stay ter dinner anyway. I ain’t got any turkey this year. Seems too much for one, an’ you know I get kinder sick o’ seein’ the critter hangin’ round for so long after. But I reckon we kin have a picce o” meat ’p'—’ The Captain stopped her with a gesture. His face beamed. “Don't fret about that, Miss Mehetabel,” he said, “I'll go an’ get my turke He disappeared around the rear of the cottage, but in a moment returned with a trim young turkey under his arm hen they set to work to cook the dinner. Miss Mehet- put the turkey in, while the Captain peeled some potatoes. “Captain, you don’t know how to peel potatoes. at what you're wasti She went over, picked up a potato from his lap, and started to peel a sample of her own. The Captain regarded her gravely. “Waal, Miss Mehetabel,” he said. “Maybe I don’t and maybe I do, but you don't know how to cook a turkey. That there bird ought ter be basted twict ez often as you are it:'” abc Look a-doin’ There was a long silence. Miss Mehetabel started to slice the potatoes, and put them ina pan. The Captain watched her in dismay. It wasn't his way. How do you make bread ?" he asked at last. His curiosity was aroused A MERRY CHRISTMAS! comicbooks.com