Life — November 2, 1905 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

f B fe LIQUEUR PERES CHARTREUX —GREEN AND YELLOW— KNOWN CHARTR! SENTS TH IN THE FP s NAS LIQUEUR PERES CHARTREUX (THE MONKS, HOWEVER, STILL RETAIN THE RIGHT TO POSSESS A KNOW! OF THIS DELICIOUS At Girstctass Wine Merchants. Ci i 7: They said he owed nothing when he died. A little inquiry showed he had not provided for his chief creditors—his family. This debt is best discharged through a life insurance policy in the PENN MUTUAL LIFE Philad’a | ‘Twull be nae rich man that he'll dee— jto one of their number, it was soon perceived oy) Ue) Ul Sel Big Sandy on Andy. | (Andrew Carnegie has requested that the sentence | given below be carved on his tombstone.) oO"! hae ye eared what Andy's speired to hae upo’ his tomb, When a’ his gowd is gie'n awa, an’ Death has sealed his doom ? | Nae Scriptur’ Jine wi? tribute fine that dealers aye keep handy But juist this irreleegious sentence— “That's Damned White of Andy!” The gude Scot laughs at epitaphs that are but meant to flatter — But never ane was sae profane, an’ that’s nae laughin matter, Yet, gin he gies his siller all awa, mon, he’s a dandy, An’ we'll admit his right to it, for ‘That's damned white o' Ani There's not to be a “big, big D," and then a dash thereafter, For Andy wouldna spoil the word by tryin’ to mak it safter; He's not the lad to juggle terms, or soothin’ speech to bandy— A blunt, straightforward mon is h That's damned white 0’ Andy Sae when he’s deid, we'll gie good heed, and write itas he as We'll carve it on his headstane an’ we'll stamp it on his casket : “Wha dees rich, dees disgraced,” says he—an’ sure’s | name is Sandy, An’ that’s damred white o' Andy ! —Trppy, # Cleveland Leade! Close. ‘ speaking of the humorous side of legal gs, a New York lawyer tells of an y verdict rendered by a jury in The jury had gone out to delib- on the question whether the defendant upon the property of his neighbors by permitting his cattle to roam at will The jurors had a “deadlock,” and, according that they would never agree. Consequently, it seemed to them a good idea to effect a com- promise; so they brought in this verdict: “We, the jury, find the defendant almost guilty.”—Harper’s Weekly. Adulterated Ground. ces STOMER: Are you positive that was ure ground coffee you sold me last week? Grocer: Of course Tam. What makes you doubt it? “Oh, nothing—only there was some gravel in the ground.”—E.xchange. WELLS said Dumiey, self-complacently, after his first after-dinner specch, “you didn’t think I could speak, did 5 “I confess,” replied Knox, “that I can’t think of anything so marvellous that has happened for years, Not since Balaam’s time, in fact.”"— Philadelphia Press. “Fond memory lingers o’er last night's feast.” Mineral Water of health and refreshment that leaves pleasant recollections of a time well spent. WASSERMANN BROTHERS BANKERS AND BROKERS 42 Broadway, New York j New York Stock Exchange Members of } New York Coffee Exchange | Chicago Board of Trade BRANCH OFFICES: Astor Coart (Waldorf-Astoria Hotel.) Windeor Arcade, corner 46th St, and 5th Ave. Imperial Hotel. Fifth Avenue Hotel. Ocean Avenue, West End, N.J., daring Sammer months. comicbooks.com