Life, 1905-08-24 · page 3 of 24
Life — August 24, 1905 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two prose pieces with accompanying illustrations rather than political cartoons: **"No Comparison"** presents a humorous poem about a man comparing his romantic conquests—cigars smoked, fish caught, and kings hunted—to "shirt-waists" (women's blouses, period slang for women). The joke is the absurdity of comparing romantic interests to inanimate objects or animals. **"Qualified"** tells an anecdotal story about two friends: one becomes a hermit, the other travels. Upon reuniting, the hermit claims expertise in women based on limited experience, having "lived with" only one woman. The satire mocks men's presumption of understanding women while having minimal actual interaction with them. Both pieces satirize early 20th-century male attitudes toward women—treating them as conquests while remaining fundamentally ignorant about them.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
223 No Comparison. HE people that I've smiled Wild animals I've fou ‘ars that IT have smoked at, The fish that I have caught— The kings that I've hobnobbed with, And all the rest, you bet, Are absolutely nothing to ‘The shirtwaists I have met! Qualified. WO friends started out in life, cach of them resolving to pursue his own ideal. «And one of them went out to see the world, and the other be- came a hermit After many years they metagain. And the hermit said “ There is only one thing that I am very curious about—women. Have you met any?” “Have T met any!” exclaimed the other, smiling. “Why, women have been my specialty.” “Are they vain?” “"v “Are they selfish?” “Very, “Are they inquisitive?” “Dear me, yes!” “Is it true they talk continuously?” “Oh, yes.” Are they extravagant?” ; enough to sui Ilave they any good point Well, I should say they had.” What are they?” “Well, they can be un: ndeed! “And they can hold their tongues— when the object warrants it.” “You don't say.” nd they can save, if they love “How interestir “And they are good nurses. In fact, they differ widely in their capabilities. ‘They are constant and inconstant, fickle ¢, small and large, charitable haritable, good, bad and indif- The hermit grasped his companion’s hand eager! “My friend,” he said, “this is all very wonderful to. me—your knowledge of woman is evidently extens And now, tell me how many of them you have lived with.” And the friend replied: “One.” comicbooks.com