Life — November 10, 1904 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

oer Ea ES ARE CHRISTMAS PRESENTS A BLESSING OR A NUISANCE? FFOR the best answer to this question, contained in five hundred words or less, Live will give fifty dollars. Correspondents may treat the subject in any way they prefer. As our question applies only to adults, it meets with the hit. full approval of Santa Claus. The New Régime. “ T)ARLING, gown?" As she spoke, the head of the house, who was playing the part of her lord and master, looked at his wife reproach- fully. “Did you not,” he observed severe- ly, ‘ttake that fashion pill I left for you this morning ?” “N-no,"" she faltered, ‘I forgot it."” “Then take it at once and be cured of the new dress habit. I’m going down to the club.’” It was her turn now, “To the club?’ she repeated tri- umphantly, nd so, dear, you, too, have been rer Did not the faith doctor, when he called last week, order you to take an anti-club capsule after each meal?"’ Her husband averted his gaze. “Forgive me, darling,” he mur- mured, as he went obediently to the medicine chest, and did he desired. “«By the way,’’ he continued pres- ently, ‘Is that young man calling on our daughter Penelope yet ?”” “*Yes—she expects him to-night.”” “Then tell her to take those anti- spooning tablets. And how is the baby?” Splendid. Since the doctorgave him the non-destructive drops, I have kept him in the front parlor. The cook was going to leave this morning and I gave her a big dose of staying solution, and she swears now she'll never leave me.”” ‘There was a sudden ring at the door. The maid came up. ““A man to collect this bill, sir.’’ Husband and wife smiled serenely. She went over tothe chest and returned with a box, “Here, Jane,” she said, ‘‘tell him to take one of these pills every hour, until the impulse to collect that bill has left him entirely.” can I have a new Tom Masson. OUR BOYS. PIERPONT. He isa real nice little boy, and loves to play with his toys. He is very fond of choo-choo cars, and has a lot of rail- roads in his back yard for his own amusement. He is also a great lover of animals and often plays with his Uncle Sam's pet elephant. Once when the elephant was sick, Pierpont took care of him and nursed him back to life, and his Uncle was very grateful and gave him a lot of money. Pierpont is very fond of swapping things. Once he swapped a lot of old iron with his Tis is young Pierpont, chum Andy, and all the other boys laughed and thought Pierpont had got left, but he knew better than that, for he sold it to a lot of jays at a handsome profit. Pierpont is a good little boy, and goes to church almost every Sunday and puts his money in the contribution box, which makes the minister ever so glad to think that Pierpont is all to the good. Some day, when Pierpont grows to be aman, perhaps the Lord will reward him for his good deeds. Prophecy. 'HE prints have it that divers of Dr. Dowie's adherents took offense at the glad clothes with which the prophet lately endued himself, and have ceased to adhere. It is impossible to please everybody. No doubt, if the Doctor Pulcherrimus wore only the pelt of a sheep, after the . manner of the first Elijah, there would be those to take offense, ‘The prophet who has succeeded in de- taching a generation of vipers from their money is entitled to indulge the vagaries which are inseparable from the highest genius. The true financier, whether his business be religion or what not, rises above ordinary copventions. And, of course, Dr. Dowie choosing to wear a white satin polonaise, with a breastplate of twelve jewels, does not make him the less the mouth of truth and the heart of righteousness. comicbooks.com