Life — August 11, 1904 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHEN THIS CRUEL WAR IS OVER. The Proper Time. COLLEGE education was roam- ing around in search of a job. “Take off your coat," said a prac- tical idea. So the college education took off its coat. Now take off your waistcoat," said the P. I, The college education did so, “Now,” said the P. I., ‘remove your collar and tie, your shirt, your—" “But,” interrupted the C. E., “‘there’ll soon be nothing left of me." “I know it,” replied the P. I, “then yéu can begin.” HE: Shall we goto church in the auto, dear? He: By all means. It’s bound to break down before we get there, 145 A Rhyme of Pure Reason. CHRISTIAN SCIENCE Proselyte, Alone upon a mountain height, Was Pondering upon the vain Belief in non-existent Pain, How nervous Dread of any kind Was an Illusion of the Mind, When coming down the mountain side A dreadful Lion he espied. The Proselyte said, Mercy me!” And quickly Scuttled up a Tree. Next Morning at the rise of sun ‘There came an Unconverted One Who saw the Proselyte at bay And drove the hungry Beast away. ‘The Cynic said, Aha! I see Your Claim has got you up a Tree.” * Your judgment,” said the Proselyte, “ Arises from Imperfect Sight. “A Lion, to a Soul refined, Is an Illusion of the Mind.” “If that's the Case,” the Cynic said, “ Why show these human signs of Dread ? “ Why pass the night, secure from harm, In yonder Elevated Palm >” “* Friend,” said the Saint, “If you but knew # This Tree is an Illusion, too. “When in a Jungle, far from Home, Where purely Mental Lions roam, “+ Tt puts one more at Ease to be Up some Imaginary Tree.” * How great is Mind 1” the Stranger cried, And went bis way quite Eddy-fied. Wallace Irwin, Barred Out. BEAUTIFUL sunset was on its way to a man’s soul, when it en- countered a row of unpaid bills. “You can’t get over us,” said the unpaid bills, ‘‘and you can’t shine through us.’ ‘MAKING LITTLE THINGS COUNT.” comicbooks.com