Life, 1904-07-07 · page 9 of 40
Life — July 7, 1904 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine contains literary content rather than political satire. The header image titled "On the Heights, Dreamland" depicts two figures observing a mountainous landscape—likely illustrative rather than satirical. The page features three poems: "The Panama Brook" by Wallace Irwin, and "Breaking It to Him" (author unclear). The dialogue piece "Breaking It to Him" appears to be a brief satirical sketch about a man being informed of his nomination for Vice-President, with his concerned response suggesting reluctance or discomfort with the position. The specific historical context—which Vice-Presidential nomination this references—remains unclear without the magazine's date, but the humor derives from the subject's apparent dismay at receiving high political office.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Copyright, 1904, by Life Publishing Co. _ The Panama Brook. COME from haunts of Washington And make a sudden sally To rouse the sleepy Isthmian And bicker through his valley. Through thirty hills they'll shovel me, Through thirty Constitutions, Hy thirty millions in Pare And thirty revolutions. Till through the microbe beds I flow Toward the yellow fever; For germs may come and germs may go, But I go on forever. And ia and out they draw my route, With here an angry Solon, And here and there a question mark, And here and there a Colon, With here and there a Watterson To rant of ** P, Vanilla,” ON THE HEIGHTS. DREAMLAND, And here a Nicaragua gun From some outraged flotilla, But still my undug banks I fret By many a tropic hovel, And wonder where the deuce they'll get The laborers to shovel. For while my dank miasmas grow Malaria’s saffron fever, Disease may come, disease may go,— But I go on forever. Wallace Irwin, Breaking It to Him. OLEMNLY, slowly, the dignified body of men walk up the steps and into the house. Surrounding the man, they regard him with pitying glances for a time. One after the other seems about to speak, but re- frains. Finally the man breaks the silence, “What is it, gentlemen? Tell me the worst. Anything is better than this suspense."” “Mr. Hurdov,"” murmurs the brav- est of them, ‘‘are you prepared to hear the crushing news we must convey?" “IT hope so,"’ he whispers. “You have been nominated for Vice-President !"" “* Well,” says the man after a pause. “ Better men than I have lived through it." “But that is not all, You have been nominated on the Prohibition ticket. Realizing that the anguish of a strong man was too sacred to witness, the committee of friends turned and departed as they had come. comicbooks.com