Life — June 2, 1904 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“LLP E & Heart to Heart Talks. By W. J. Brayon. car Children : 1 don't suppose there is a little boy or girl here who hasn't heard of me, or that I am called the silver-tongued orator of the West. But you also know, dear little ones, if you have studied mineralogy, that in order to produce the loudest noi silver always has to be mixed with brass, and that is my case. So I want you all to remember, if you wish to succeed, to throw in 9 little brass. Silver is good, dear children, but brass is better, especially if it comes from Nebraska, Thope there isn’t any one of you who feels sorry for me because there are some people who think I am a sort of Presidential public nuisance, because to be truly great one must advertise himself in every way possible, and there are always some finicky folks who dislike too much of an over-advertised article. In my case, these folks happen to be what are called the regular Democrats. Now, does any little boy or girl know the difference between a regular and an irregular Democrat? Ne Well, dearies, a regular Democrat is one who holds office when the G. O. P. gets tired, and an irregular Democrat doesn't have to hold office at all, because, 1f he is like me, he can make enough money by his lonesome. That is one of the secrets of succe ar lil and girls, If you can’t all be President, flock by your lonesome and start @ paper. Remember that, to succeed, it is not always necessary to accomplish your desi Thav F elt that Free Silver was the only thing worth living for, and yet, as a true friend to the workingman, I have managed to tolerate the gold standard enough to keep about half a million between me and the wolf at the do Never let the wolf at the door get the best of you, rs, as long as you have a tongue. Be a Socialist and a friend of the workingman, if you will, but put money in thy purse. And now I must leave you and go and try to learn how to ride a donkey. You may all come and watch me if you like, as I don't care how many are looking on, even if I don’t have any luck. This donkey is a peculiar animal, my dears, and very tricky. I tried to get on his back several years ago, but I didn’t stay. And what do-you suppose he did? Why, he went off in a corner and laid down, But I'm in hopes he will get up soon and give me another chance. In the meantime, never pay more than a Mexican dollar for your dinner, and take everything that comes your way. When you make a bet, always have the odds sixteen to one. Resist not evil, a chance to talk, or ‘ood offer. And if at first you don’t succeed in riding the donkey, try, try again. T. M. Special. PETERSBURG, via Sandwich, Greenwich and Timbuctoo, May 25.—Popu- lar feeling is at feversheat because of the cowardly and inhuman conduct of A. } i the Japanese in the recent blowing up administered to Admiral Trolleyoft’s fleet. Pr Advices from Port Arthur are that the Russians were asleep when attacked, and no pa “ srgeeGY warning whatever had been sent them of the enemy's intentions. ZEEE A Russian general has written a letter home, in which he rebukes the Japanese in no uncertain terms for their cruelty in making attacks upon the Russians while the aner — latter are not looking. ‘The Czar, the Czarina, the Czarevitch, the Czarowsky and the Czaroff spent yes- terday in the imperial image house. A sacred croquet ball has been sent to the front with an imperial escort, and great Russian victories are expected to follow its “ Throw ina little brass.” ij . ae arrival in the Far East,