Life — April 7, 1904 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

-LIFE- PUSHER sat id took a RS. HARDY down last Thursday rest. But, it being nearly got up again, later, and put on her famous pearl neckla Mrs. Pusher never eats onions. Mr. and Mrs. tertained the Duke of Debt- shire last Monday. He sat with both elbows on the table between courses and was generally delightful. He may marry a few Ameri- can heiresses before return- ing to old England. Society usually dates its events from the movements of Mrs. Toppother Heep. That lady sails in April for Europe. She will remain until she goes for a short visit to London before open- ing her Newport villa for the season. In Paris Mrs, Heep has a splendid apart- ment on the Avenue Champs sées. She is always charming, with an income of about two millions. Mrs. Purs rutt is wear- ing a very modish gown of black velvet which she usu- ally sets off with a hand- some black picture hat. Mrs, Brazen Glare also wea most becoming black tailor- made suit with large black hat. Mrs. Stilor Nuthen is wearing a great deal of gray, which makes her ap- pear stouter than darker shades would. Kommunbut Innitt en- Mrs. Kommunbut Innitt was a prominent figure at the opera last winter, and she thoroughly enjoyed it. She isa charming woman, and just dotes hai World. HE world is the first mud ball you come to after leaving the Great Bear—turn to your right after the Dipper, and it's three doors beyond Saturn. The world has been highly advertised as a choice piece of real estate, not more than an hour's ride from the Sun, and where you can own your own home on the installment plan without making a deposit. Asa matter of fact, a great deal of it is under water and all tlie best parts'taken on fashionable society. 327 up by society people, thus making it undesirable property to hold. ‘The natural features of the world can easily be distin- guished on a clear day through a strong glass, and in the order of their importance are—first, advertising signs ; sec- ond, ladies’ hats, which are now worn large; and third, tiaras, visible only by X-rays. The world is purely subjective in its mentality, and, in common with like infusoria, imagines it is the whole show. It has swung on its axis since day before yesterd expected to last until about five to-morrow. Those who desire to view the phenomena of its disap- pearance may secure seats in advance at the box office, good and is eats being, howev obtainable, as a large house is not anticipated, the spec. tacular effect not being highly creditable to the management. Tom Masson. An Actress of the Later School. MY DEAR MR. PLAY- RIGHTER: In re- gard to the play there are several changes which I must insist?upon as condu- cive to itssuccess— namely, the following : The second scene in the third act should not be in the Duchess’s drawing-room but in her boudoir, as I have the dearest negligée which I got in Paris and which I am simply crazy to wear. Then you must arrange to have me come in barefoot in one of the nes, You know that French artist who was over here last year simply raved about my feet. Now I ought to take my hair down and do it up again. My hair, you know, is considered a very rare shade, and then I think a woman never looks so fetch- ing as when doing up her Also, in some scene or other you must have me frightened at a mouse, as I have the most alluring stoc— well, stockings which once belonged to Marie Antoinette. As to the last scene, have it arranged so Antonio can kiss me right below the left ear, as it disarranges my pompadour so to be kissed on the face. I am perfectly willing to have you write a new plot if you cannot otherwise make these changes. Yours, Marte La Divoreée. comicbooks.com