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Life, 1904-03-10 · page 2 of 20

Life — March 10, 1904 — page 2: what you’re looking at

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Life — March 10, 1904 — page 2: Life, 1904-03-10

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertisements** with one satirical article. The main content is a humorous piece about the "Royal German Band" visiting the country. The satire mocks German cultural pretensions by having the advance agent claim the band's music is superior to a musician's life, then describes absurd scenarios where the band performs before various European royalty and dignitaries—the Sultan, the Czar, and others—with increasingly ridiculous consequences (turkeys stuffing instruments, drummers unable to play). The joke targets both German cultural superiority and European monarchy's perceived absurdity. The piece appears designed to entertain American readers by satirizing German nationalism and royal European customs. The remaining content consists of period advertisements for corsets, cravats, pianos, and travel services—typical of *Life* magazine's commercial pages.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

COPYRIGHT FOR GREAT BRITAIN BY JAMES HENDERSON ' THE SPRING STYLES are offered in the confidence that they embody all the improvements and modifications that the season's modes demand. Although the extreme scarcity of whalebone is compelling an almost universal substitution of inferior bon- ing materials, we are pleased to an- nounce that we ve secured a better quality of whalebone than has ever before been used in corsets. Styles range ia price frees $3.00 to $15.00 per pair. ‘The Warner Brothers Company. New York, Chicago and ‘San Francisco, Men’s Furnishings. Exclusive patterns in high class Cravats. The smartest European and American Effects. Hanakerchiefs, Gloves. Broadoory A 194b ot. NEW YORK. eee {s[ BE Royal German Band is coming to this | + country, it is rumored. The advance agent | was formerly the piccolo player, but believes now | that the strenuous life of an advertising man is happier, and safer, of course, than that of a mu- | sician. Some of his reasons for this belief were related last night. ‘Lin der bandt at vonce vhas,” said he, ‘‘ but now I vhas nod now. Der reason is dis: We blay before his Royal Highness that Heaven-born | Kaiser, Wilhelm. Er sagt, ‘Oh, mine great little | German bandt! I vill send you away some, so |that the worldt delighted may be!’ Und we stardt oudt. We blay in Russia, before the Czar. ** He says, ‘Who is dis?” ‘Der Royal Cherman bandt.’ ‘Te says, ‘Wonterful! Gif each blayer his instrument full of gold.” De bass drummer, he geds to be ien millionaire! Der trombone blayer, he gedsrich. But I—I—I blay de piccolo, * We go to oder countries, We come to Tur- key. We blay before a sick feller of Europe, der Sultan, He says, ‘Who is dis ?’ * We says, ‘Der famous Royal Cherman bandt!’ “He says, ‘Take them away. They're horri- bleness! Stuff their instruments down their throats!’ His turkeys tooked us oudt. The bass drummer—they can’t stuff his drum down his throat, The trombone blayer—his mouth ain't too big for his horn to ged in. But I—I-I, alas! I blay de piccolo! Ausgerspielt- verdammitdreizeits !"— Philadelphia Press. Owing to the terrible fire in Baltimore last month, among the victims of which was the firm of C, W, Abbott & Co,, manufacturers of Abbott's Angostura Bitters, Messra. Abbott & Co, wish to announce that they have temporartly located at 224 South Charles Street, in that city. They propose to distribate the limited stock saved among thelr customers in such manner that all may receive the best service that the circumstances will permit. Assoon as the debris of the fire Is cleared away, @ new and more commo- dious laboratory will be erected on the old site, until which time the frm requests the indulgence of its patrons in the filling of orders, MEXICO The Italy of America WHEREIN ARE LOCATED The Ruins of Mitla, The Cata- combs of Guanajuato, The Pyramids of Cholula, The Valley and Hills of Monterey BEST REACHED VIA Southern Pacific SUNSET ROUTE IN CONNECTION WITH MEXICAN INTERNATIONAL RLR. DAILY SERVICE Inquire at Street, 109 South Third Street, 100 Kast Baltimore's York haltimores <? city 129 South Frankiln Street, L. H. NUTTING, G. EP, A., New York Gt EO. McCORMICK, P. nF % T. J, ANDERSON, 170 Washington WILLIAMS ») SHAVING STICK Shaving—and Saving Shaving with greater com- fort, luxury, convenience. Saving in time, temper and money. A single stick affords over 300 shaves. No cup required. Only the shaving stick and brush. age. of all drugeists, ‘be J. B. WILLIAMS CO., Glastonbury, Conn. NY OLD POINT COMFORT, RICH- MOND AND WASHINGTO Six-day Tour via Pennsylvania Railroad, The Orst personally-condacted tour to Old Point Comfort, Kichmond, and Washington via the Pennsylvania Katlroad for the present season will leave New York and Philadelphia on Saturday, March 12, Tickets, Incloding transportation, meals en rowfe in both directions, transfers of engers and baggage, hotel accommodations at Old Point Com- fort, Richmond, aud Washington, and carriage ride about Richmond—In fact, every necessary expense for a period of six days—will be sold at rate of $36.00 from New York, Brooklyn, and Newark ; $34.0 from Trenton ; $33.00 from Philadelphia, and. Proportiouate rates from other stations. OLp Poixt Cosrort OXLY. Tickets to Old Point Comfort only, including luncheon on going trip, one and tbrec-fourtba days’ board at Chamberiin Hotel. aud good to return direct by regular trains within six days. will be sold In connection with tbls tour at rate of $17.00 from New York, Brooklyn, and Newark ; $15.60 from Trenton ; $14.60 from ‘Philadelphia, and pro- Portionate rates from other points, For itineraries and full information apply to ticket agents; Tourist Agent, 263 Fifth Avenue, New York ; 4 Court Street, Brooklyn ; 789 Broad Street, Newark, N. J.; or Geo. W. Boyd, Assistant General Passenger Agent, Broad’ Street Station, Philadelphia, Chickering PIANOS CHICKERING 6& SONS, 796 Tremont St, Boston, Mass. comicbooks.com