Life — September 17, 1903 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Identity. OMEWH E in the Inferno’s nd’s Land, in Torture nkillers met face to other stand. Aud who are you, sir?” seream two, With pompous blusterin’ and splurgin’, nd you?” * An appendicitis surgeon “Taman aut Scotia. ‘THe Scotch dialect was invented in the Fifth Century, B. C., to con- ceal the thoughts of the hardy clans- men at golf. When, two thousand years later, John Knox stirred the religions nature of his people to its depths, and the need of concealment became correspondently more acute, the dialect was vastly complicated. he Scotch mist is a wise provision of nature, the Scot being unable to withstand contact with water except in a very attenuated form. scotch whiskey needs no bush. We have, however, the Bonnie Brier Bush. The bagpipe or dudelsack was origi- nally thought to be music. It per- dures through the inability of the Scotch to admit that they were ever mistaken. eps the world of lovers erywhere you find t To his melodies entra dar cing, — Weak with strong ones, Short with long ones, Dark with light ones, Dull with bright ones, — Foolish, frenzied, fascinated, shing wildly to be mated ; -LIFE- The Scotch devised a system of phi- losophy which they call the Common Sense philosophy, thus disposing for- ever of the absurd charge that they have no sense of humor. Andrew Carnegie was born in Scot- land, He is Scottish, partly because nd partly because he is never in the wron; Scotland or Scootiun was the Ultima Thule of The country mentioned in some of Mr. Barrie's stories. Usual. HE OLD MAN: Isn't it possible for you to go to college without having to play sr, spend money and raise vil generally? Tur Sox: But, governor, I thought you wanted take the regular course. me to academic cate A Small Favor. | ie RMER (¢0 lady): my bull? Lavy: Mercy, no! “He got loose. Have you seen Where is he? And if you should him, will you please keep on it there red coat and run_ this way?” nies “THAT's ALL ROUT, BET YC AGAIN, AN JUST SAY ‘RInDIE’ TOME L COME DOWN AN? ERADE: Pruystoexomy.”” DOG OF NO DOK RY LINIAMENT OF YE Easily Explained. “ QTRANGE that after reaching the ‘top of the ladder he should fall so suddenly.” “There was a woman at the bottom of i.” LARGE contract — hug; the shore. ing Love’s Dance. “Ob, Love's but a dance Where Time plays the fiddle t — Dodson. Partners chosen in a hurry With no thought of woe or worry,— Gay with sad ones, Good with bad ones, Sane ones often watched with mad ones ; Here, a Helen with her Paris, Ther arl has caught an heiress ; Beast with Beauty, laine with supple, Whirling couple after couple ; Poor and prou Still and loud ones, Mild and bold ones, Young and old ones,— All the world, —the wise and stupid,— Lured to love by Master Cupid : So, Myrtilla, while the measure s, may I have the pl Happy Time, when he discovers Us among these dancing lovers! Feliz Carmen, sure? comicbooks.com