Life — January 22, 1903 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AN OMAR FOR LADIES, “Tis,” observed Wu, as he lifted a box-like One for her Club and her own Latchkey fights, affair from bis trunk, “is one of the greatest won- Another wastes in Study her good Nights. ders of America.” Ab, take the Clothes and let the Culture go, “It doesn't look very wonderful,” commented Nor heed the grumble of the Women's Rights! Tsi Ann, tucking one foot up where she could sit Look at the Shopgirl all about us- Lo, on it and the throne at the same time. The Wages of a month,” she says, “I blow “No, but even in America no one can understand In to a Hat, and when my hair ts waved, it. Listen.” Doubtless my Friend will take me to the Show.” “Don't put that thing to my ear,” cautioned Abd ehe Who eaved ber Cole for Plandete ted, Tsi Ann. “Is this another of those telephones?” And sbe who caught Pueumonia Instead, “O, no, This is worse than the telephone. It Will both be Underground in Fifty Years, is a gas meter.” tead. “A gas meter? What does it do?” And Prudence pays no Premium to the d “The consumer.” “How does it work?” “That is a mystery. It is only known that it works always and untiringly. It works while you sleep and while you wake. It never stops. It is constructed after the Newtonian theory of creation It has something in it that just keeps It whirling on and on, so much per revolution, and nobody knows what keeps it moving, and nobody can stop They say Sixth Avenue and the Bowery keep it.” The dernier cri that once was far from cheap “That's funny. Green Veils, one season chic—Department stores “Funny, yes. But very sad in America. Listen Mark down in vatn—no profit shall t reap. to it Hear it running right along. Thank Con- —Josepbine Dodge Daskam, in Harper's Magazine fuctus and the 900 gods of the Pale Green Moun- Th’ exclusive Style you set your heart upon Gets to the Bargain counters—and anon Like monograms on a Saleslady’s‘tle Cheers but a moment—soon for you ‘tis gone. Think, in the sad Four Hundred’s gilded halls, Whose endless Leisure ev'n themselves appalls, How Ping-pong raged so high—then faded out To those far Suburbs that still chase its Balls. tains! The gas company never will to read what this meter has recorded. “But,” said the Empress, “is there no excay from this in America?” “None.” “It must be worse than manifest destiny.” “It Is." “Wu,” remarked Tst Ann, with that fotelliges| smile which has enshrined her in the hearts ¢ curio collectors, “Wu, I am glad you were sent u America. At one time I almost had decided to te come civilized.” “So had I,” acknowledged Wu, “but the dite ¢ tho dog. as the foreign devils put {t, will cure t hair."—Chicago Tribune. <T month,” wrote the editor of one of th most progressive of the many magazines having ea the greatest number of intelligent readers, in by Prospectus, “we shall begin the publication of» t them—1,000 articles on the stle of St. Peter, by the colonel o Seventy-ninth Regiment of Oklahoma Volunteers Then he remarked to his entourage that he guess certain rival publications would wish they do never been born, so hot had the pace become— Detroit Journal Lave 1s for sale by all Newadeslers in Great Britain, The International News Company, Bream’s Batiding, Chancery Lane, London, E.C., England, AGrsts. Established 1823. In Best Places WILSON Hunter WHISKEY. Whiskey Stands Foremost. That’s All! THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., Wa. Lananan & Sox, Baltimore, Md. Baltimore, M. ebenal) ote Washable Dress Goods. eld, Gabrielle Saitings, nidered Grass Linen, red Butchers’ Linen, ing, E . White Silk Orga : : ; Mercerized Canvas and Ch D. & J. Anderson's Ginghams and Cheviots. Rroadooay Ao 19th ot. club or dealer's NEW YORK Cigarette of Quality AROMATIC DELICACY— MILDNESS-— PURITY North Fourth Ave., Mount Vernon, N. Y. TROCHES CHESTER’ CREST, BROWN’S BRONCHIAL BLACK, STARR AND FROST, A quiet resort with every comfort, for Fifty years of success prove these 438 FIFTH AVE., NEW YORK. men nervourly disordered through dissipa-}|[{troches the simplest and best remedy tion. Commanications strictly confidential, for Coughs, Hoarseness, Bronchial —445 A. Mount Vernon. In boxes—never sold in bulk, FASHIONABLE PERFUME OF V | 0 L E T T E S$ dU Cc L A FRESE VERE A SHON AELEAPERLOR 1900) comicbooks.com