Life — December 4, 1902 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Me and the King. He. tapped me familiarly on the shoul- ~ der, did the king. I turned quickly, expecting to reprimand one of those im- portunate beggars tbat had annoyed me frequently since my arrival in the realm. As it was, my first impulse was to kneel to his Majesty. It was the first time a king had deigned to tap me on the shoul- der. But a good-humored grin from his Highness restored my wonted assurance and I quickly assumed an attitude of in- difference. “Well? "I asked, laconically. “Excuse my forwardness in accosting a stranger, but——"” ‘It was somewhat bold,” I said, though the calmness of my words belied my feel ings. **T was about to say that I happen to be king of this region and——” “Tam aware of that. I have often seen your picture.” “But, sir, it 1s customary to act a trifle less flippant in my presence "—this in a tone that betrayed a little vexation at my apparent lack of awe. Goodness knows my heart was thumping away at a terrific rate, but I have learned to keep my com- posure at all times, ‘* You are entirely too presumptuous in addressing me at all,” he continued, more and more exasperated at my manner. **You will remember, your Majesty, that you tapped me on the shoulder first.” ‘And if I did, who are you, anyway?” * lapsing into feminine modes of arguing. “You may have seen my likeness in the illustrated papers, also?” I ventured. He seemed taken aback. I proceeded to drive the nail home. THINGS ARE COMING TO & HEAD. ‘LIP E.* “Now, what might a—er—benevo- lent capitalist do to raise the financial status of a kingdom?” The king looked foolish, He was astounded at my insight and confused by my frankness. Then he laughed. “Well, since we might as well speak boldly, Mr. Norgan, it occurred to me that our realm might be incorporated 483 sharebolder— myself. He demurred, on the ground that I was proposing a scheme of government similar to the ancient feudal system. Ina few well- chosen phrases I explained to him the tendency of the times, the necessity for centralization of capital and power; and as a further proof of the value of my argument, I showed bim that morn- MB AND THE KING. —a few millions of bonds issued, and a sufficiently large issue of stock to main- tain respectability.” “And I should be king,” I hazarded. “‘Oh,remember your plebeian origin!” “Remember your impecuntosity ! I snapped. The poor king looked so crestfallen at the loss of his nominal power that out of sheer pity I told him that he might remain at the head of the corpo- ration, but that he must, of course, be always subservient to the largest ing’s paper, wherein was an account of how I had obtained complete control of the States bordering on the Missis- sippi River. His face brightened as I unfolded to him my ambitions. With tears of happy sympathy he grasped my hand and said: ‘1 willdo all in my power to aid you in becoming owner of the Uni- verse, and I trust you will always re- member that mine was the first mon- archy to join the system.” I glanced at my watch and then ata comicbooks.com