Life — December 4, 1902 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“TaIs 18 YOUR Room, BOD; OUR PIRST OUEST CHauBER."” “an, Quite & Mesum.” “WELL, YOU SEE, IT 18 WHERE WE PUT THE THINGS We'RZ TIRED OF.” blessing of this age is the formulation of the surgeon’s creed.”” He bowed his head and reverently repeated the first two clauses: “We beliovo that Nature bas made certain vast mistakes ! «We believe that every buman being is the better for having the greatest possible number of his or her organs removed !”” Mra, Wilson Woodrow, Tempora Mutantur. E are a bit startled to read of Count Castellane spending twenty-five thousand dollars entertain- ing the King of Portugal for a single day. However, turning Erie and Missouri Pacific water into wine is by nomeans the miracle it would have been once, 491 On a Purse. A ersovan it may seem funny to Some persons that a purse, And one that’s meant for money, too, Should be extolled in verse ; Myrtilla's purse,—the dream of it Pursues me all the time, So I have made a theme of it And put it into rhyme. Ofsealskin wrought and beautiful To look upon, I grant, To keep it, ‘tis my duty, full Of dollars but I can't; Yet if I dared to charge enough For poetry and prose, This purse would not be large enough For her, Myrtilla knows. It is for her I versify A thing so very small; She would not need a purse if I Should never sing at all ; And since the sorry sight of it Shows her financial wreck, Empty! I must make light of it And try to find a check. Feliz Carmen. Poverty. OVERTY is no crime. This is quite fortunate. For if poverty were acrime, simple jastice, to say nothing of the peace and dignity of the commonwealth, would demand that the poor be put in jail. But with the poor in jail, how would it be possible to collect much of any taxes for the support of the Govern- ment? Of course the authorities, inasmuch as they are mostly not in office for their health, would wink at poverty, and suffer the laws against the same to become dead letters. The present arrangement is much less scandalous, A Specialty. } EW ARRIVAL: Can you far- nish me with a robe that will conceal all the bruises I have? Sr.Perer: Certainly. We have robes specially designed for New Yorkers. i D” Bumper stand well in col. lege?” “Centre rush.” comicbooks.com