Life, 1902-10-30 · page 8 of 22
Life — October 30, 1902 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page features a biographical entry on **Chauncey Depew**, a prominent figure described as a dealer in jokes and anecdotes who became a U.S. Senator. The accompanying illustration satirizes him as a somewhat pompous, rotund gentleman in formal dress, suggesting his self-importance. The satire targets Depew's reputation for telling the same stories repeatedly and his tendency toward self-promotion. The text notes he "never to tell the same story once" and made a "specialty of honeymoons and reading notices"—suggesting he was known for recycled anecdotes rather than original wit. The small dialogue snippets below mock everyday absurdities—a sick grandmother and a boring theatrical performance—typical of Life's humorous commentary on American social life and pretension.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
370 Life’s Dictionary of International Biography. CHAUNCEY DEPEW. A DEALER in second-hand jokes and - orange blossoms, who was at one time used quite extensively asa lay figure for interviewers, but now retired ; also an extinguished member of the United States Senate, a body of financiers who love the money of their country better than them- selves. Mr. Depew was born in Peekskill, on the confines of the New York Central Accident Assurance Company (accidents always assured), and at theearly age of three was sent to Egypt to receive his education. Having formed an intimate acquaintance with the mummies of Amenotep III. and Rameses II, he started out on his career of story-teller, using Peekskill as a screen to conceal the origin of his tales. He soon became famous, being known abroad as a “representative American,’ one of the cruelest jokes ever perpetrated upon an unsuspecting people. Atan early age Mr. Depew became rail- road struck, and having passed several months in the tunnel, naturally got to be president, his previous training having eminently fitted him for the job. His duties while occupying this post were onerous. He received all representatives of the press, making it a strict rule of his life never to mention himself or talk over the confidential affairs of the road, except when they were present. He attended all the press club dinners, thus keeping him- self in touch with our leading brewers, bar- bersand grocers, broadening his views of life in general, and giving him a speaking acquaintance with our representativo trades. He also made it a rule to go abroad once a year, his annual forecasts of general con- ditions, invariably and inevitably given out ; on his return, ranking in merit with the — predictions of our esteemed weather burean, Mr. Depew, while making a specialty of honeymoons and reading notices, is also an after-dinner speaker, and makes it a firm rule never to tell the same story once. In later years, however, he has not talked nearly so much, which leads us to the hope that he may live to a ripe old age. Principal occupations : Talking to order, talking out of order, and talking. Favorite works: ‘‘On Many Platforms,” ‘ How to Know the Chestnuts,” ‘‘ Autobiography of a Fake," ‘ The Glad Hand and the Agate Column,” etc. Tom Masson. “ While making a specialty of honeymoons.” GMALL BOY: Give me a large bottle of the worst medicine you’ve got in your store. Drucaist: What's the matter? “ Well, I’ve been left all alone with grandma, and she's suddenly been taken sick, and I'm going to get even with her!" THEATRE party is a mistake: If the play is inter- esting, the people bore you; if the people are inter- esting, the play bores you. comicbooks.com