Life — July 24, 1902 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A July Dinner. RY A JUNE GRADUATE, MARRIED Betty the day after her “Commence- ment.’ My friends guyed me about mar- rying a college girl, and what did I expect to 4 get toeat? But Betty F was not of the Greek and Latin and eye- glasses species of A.B., but of the Economico- Scientific vari- ety. (In fact, I believe her letters were BS.) After several years of club dinners, smartly served, and very French in their sauces and savories, but monoto- nous in their variety, I looked forward to being “properly nourished "’ — this was Betty's phrase — and that “ with no loss in art.’ In the words of the colored gentleman who had catered for Betty in her class-supper arrangements, “the wsthetic and the gastronomic instincts should be equally gratified.”’ And so — perhaps with some bra- vado —I invited my cynical bachelor friend, Teddy Lowndes, to our first dinner, after the return from our honeymoon to our charming new apartments in the Devonshire. The three of us sat down in con- spicnously high spirits. There was no hors d’eucre to dally with, but the soup came on without delay, and Betty served it gaily. What in the world was it? Black and thick, with a hint of sherry in the taste, it seemed a little like a black- bean purée, but Betty proudly informed us that it was made of Sicilian lentils, which could be bought of Cobb, Bates and Yerxa for four cents a pound. This notion of the greatest possible nutrition for the smallest possible out- lay had become to me a familiar shib- boleth of ‘* Domestic Science,” but I saw in Teddy's eye a slight surprise at our sudden care for pennies. ‘* Some- thing queer about that,”’ I fancied him thinking; ‘‘never knew Laurie was miserly.” -LIFE- “A pennyworth of lentils,’’ Betty went blandly on, *‘ contains, according toan English authority, as much nutri- ment as three shillings’ worth of beef."” On came the next course. Whata curious entrée! On Teddy’s plate and on mine lay two walnuts and three almonds, I glanced at Betty’s—one walnut and two almonds. The butler, trying his best to look impassive, brought a dish of chestnuts with a mushroom sauce. We mixed our variegated nuts with mushrooms and ate them nervously. The plates were removed, and followed by—a lettuce salad and cheese ! “Where the devil is the roast?”’ I muttered under my breath to the but- ler, but Betty anticipated his excuses. “We in America,” she said statis- tically, ‘eat too much, and the wrong things. This dinner affords the exact number of calorics proper for two sedentary men and one woman at light work, The nuts furnish the carbohy- drates, the lentils the necessary pro- teids, and the lettuce some mineral elements—at least, I know they added up just right in my preliminary tables——"’ We left the dining-room together. The walnuts we had had. The wine, being an unnecessary “element,” we took, Teddy and I, in my den. After a pause, Teddy remarked casu- ally that he had never seen a prettier girl than Betty. Betty is not pretty, but I felt immensely gratefal. 7 ( Civilities. PARTNER of J. P. Morgan being made a Companion of the be Bath doubtless augurs a freer in- les terchange of civil- ities between our Money Kings and the Mere Kings of Europe. But whether this will lead to the British Ambassador being made a Companion of the Quick Lunch, it is impossible to say with any degree of assurance at this time. In Training. THE PARSON: Don’t you know that smoking will stunt your growth? Tue Kip: Wot do I care? goin’ ter be a jockey, anyway. I'm Politics. TH Republicans seem to be trifling with the trust question. The Democrats talk fierce, but if they were in power they would probably be trifling too. What does it suggest? Well, among other things, that when (if ever) wealth is arrayed against the general welfare, there is no relief through party politics. Bat relief is likely to be had, and that makes the situation interesting. The trifling of politicians makes no great difference, further than that it compels relief to be had in a way which is sometimes too informal to be entirely agreeable. The Fleecer Fleeced. sf OU have been victimized,’ we say to the honest rustic, who is proudly displaying the gold brick he has brought home from the city. “You have been victimized,” we repeat. ‘This is but an imitation gold brick the man has sold you.” “Sold me?’’ he repeats, shrewdly. “Sold? Well, I guess not. I traded him cantaloupes for that.’” Laughing the merry, carefree laugh of conscious victory he chirrups to old Dobbin and goes on down the pike. DRAWING PROM THE NUDE. comicbooks.com