Life — June 5, 1902 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

er Wao AN \\ SSD ROMAN yh Aen) areuts MAE Gary entAs Tmt ot wy SLM vee iN mh iy ii : wean NY, PO) and THE NATURALIST’S DREAM, Mr. Beetle; mow po YOU DO, MISS SQUIRREL? THIS 13 PROPESSOR GRUAMAUSER, WHO WANTS TO JOIN YOUR NATURAL MISTORY CLASS. First Aid to the Injured. seems a pity that Tt I among the many meth- ods offered to the weak of our generation for the undoing of bad hab- its and the counter- acting of the conse- quent physical ills, the intellectual backsliders of the day should be left to shift for themselves. If nicotine and alco- hol go down before No-tobac and the Gold Cure, who shall say, for instance, that the novel habit } would not yield to proper treatment? Will no_philan- thropic alienist give us an effective literary antiseptic, a yellow-joarnal antitoxin, or a French novel germicide? Meanwhile we suggest a few handy remedies which we have found efficacious in emergencies. Cases of New York Journal Jaundice, exhibiting a marked contempt for facts and the gradual development of a yellow streak, may be arrested, if taken very early, by homeopathic treatment. Dose: Fifteen minutes of day- before-yesterday’s paper immediately after breakfast. Intellectual dyspepsia, following overindulgence in spiced French entre¢és and Russian translations, requires careful treatment. A low diet is often recommended, such as The Ladies’ Home Journal and Once a Week. We prefer a few months among the Literary Mountains. Historical Romantimania is generally regarded as harm- less. It is apt to become chronic, however, if neglected. A case will seldom resist a few doses of the dramatized versions, One grain of Kant’s ‘Critique of Pure Reason” and one grain of toothache, dissolved in a teaspoonful of com- mon sense, make a good lotion for mental astigmatism due to Mrs. Eddy's ‘* Science and Health.”’ Narrow Escape. AX eighty-ton automobile, going about one hundred miles an hour, collided with a party of school chil- dren on foot near the corner of Fight Hundred and Twenty- Sixth Street and Seven Hundred and Forty-ninth Avenue yesterday afternoon. The machine was thrown out of gear by the shock and the chauffeur narrowly escaped being recognized. Specta- tors of the affair are loud in their praise of his presence of mind and dexterity. Rules for Summer Resorts. PONGAGEMENTS made on these premises are not bind- ing after two weeks. Married men without their wives will please conceal their identity. Terms: Whatever the cash you have. Chaperons will not be permitted on the beach after 8:30 P.M. Guests preparing to leave should notify the head waiter and all the bell boys twenty-four hours in advance. comicbooks.com