Life — May 8, 1902 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHY NOT? (A.writer in The Week End, describing an interview with M. Worth, said that gentleman * farewelled.” It is the poet's prerogative to Increase the vocabulary, and the fol- lowing is an attempt in that direction.) I gardened in the evening hade, And birds around m Indoors my friends, as sounds betrayed, Ping-ponged. * Twas then that Jones came horsing by— His steed was newly shoed— He cordially * hutloa “-ed, and I * How-doed, He told me how his meadows grassed And how his poultry egged : His views how hoases shoald be glassed I begged. So he opinioned till 1 tired, And backed him from the theme, And then of batt'ring cows inquired And cream. While thas we conversationed, Time With ratht It darked, we heard the Vesper chi From yond. footsteps onned, At last we felt that we mast part, * Farewell, my friend,” I cried And he with angnieh at his beart, ‘Good-byed."" ndon Chronicle. AN Atchison paper notes that women kiss the hands of Paderewski and Kubelik, and asks if men were ever known to kiss the hands of female actors. Scarcely. Men never stoop so low.— Kansas City Journal. REMINGTON TYPEWRITER The Experience of a Quarter of a Century is The Confidence of the Business World is WITH IT field of usefulness is BEFORE IT WYCKOFF, SEAMANS & BENEDICT (Remington Typewriter Company) 327 BROADWAY ‘LIFE: WHO KILLS THE BiROS? Who kills the birds? 1," said ths Woman, “although ‘tis inbuman, T must have dead birds.” Who sees them diet “1 said the Man, “whenever Ean, For my sport they must die.” Who tolls the bell § 1," raid the Bor, * I love to destroy, T toll the bell Who digs their gravest ST," said the Girl, ** for a feather’s neat curl “1d dig all their graves.” ~Aakfeid Eagte. A youxo officer at San Francisco had been onlered to the Philippines, According to a Western paper, he received the following telegram from the War Department at Warh- ington : “You can go to New York, and sail on transport that goes by Suez,” The ofticer replied : direct." ‘Then the Department telegraphed him a; port will make good time; has sixty women #chool-teachers on boart.”* ‘The young lieutenant answered : “Save me a berth on transport.""— Youth's Companion. “Would prefer to cross Pacitic ‘Turns. are times when differences of rank do not count, and an Irish soldier is said to have chanced upon one of them daring the late war in Cuba, He was discovered by the sergeant of his company in a e, well out of the way of even a stray shot, when he id have been engaged in active service. “Get out of that hole!" commanded the sergeant, sternly. “Get out of it this minute!” The broad Irish face looked up at him with stubborn rc sistance written on every feature. “You may be me superior ofttcer,” he raid, boldly, “but all the same, Oi'm the wan that foand this hole fir mt — Youth's Companion, A MAN from the West who is visiting Maine recentiy fell into conversation with a quiet old farmer on a trats, He was full of the greatness of the Weet, and talked about arms and big crops of his particular section, asd p by saying : I suppose you do manage to pick up a living on thee Maine farms," The old Maine farmer emiled sadly, and replied : “ Yes: and a few years ago some of us invested money in your section, and it is there yet. It was a permanent vestment, T gues The Wi n changed the conversation, —Nav York Tribune + Ts the manager up-to-dat Sure; he’s Just introduced a game of ping-pong in the Icony scene in * Romeo and Juliet." — Yonkers Statesman, UNG MAN,” ead the resident physician at the bos pital, you have only an bonr to live.” ‘The white-robed nares moved silently to and fro asthe patient nervously clutched the bed covering. + Yes, it is my ead duty to inform you that you are goin: to that bourne from which no traveler feturne ; but all happifess there, the days know no night, and there is rest eternal—sweet rest.” The patient's eyes flashed f exclaimed Joyful s Ant and pong ball} * Then they understood. He was one of the army ping: pong plebes.—Baltimoré News. a moment, and then ke will not have to chase the—lost- present thine, All first-class establishmen NEW YORK ED. PINAUD’S y Print Fro Copyrtelt ina by Curtis @ Cameron LATEST MASTER PIECE BRISE EMBAUMEE VIOLETTE PERFUME This perfume to closely resembles the fragrance of the living viclet that It 14 them apart, It tsadmitted to be th Smallest size in an original Raccarat Write for free to ED. PINAUD'S IMPORTATION OFFICE, 46 East “C delicate iment of th 4th St., New York Mrs. Cox's Charming Painting CUPID AND PSYCHE and several others from the exhitition of the Society of American Artists reproduced exclusively in the GENUINE COPLEY PRINTS and COPLEY SEPIAS Send for sizes and prices. Tlustrated G catalogui ‘opley Prints ten ceote (stumps) CURTIS & CAMERON PUBLISHERS Pierce Building poraible to tell violet odor known at the ttle containing two ounces, Seach, Sob! at Boston i t t comicbooks.com