Life — January 16, 1902 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A Come-Down. IRST BILLIONAIRE: You're not looking very well this morning. Secoxp Brtuionarre: No. I feel like thirty million dollars. Thrifty. BH E: Why did you keep me a week in such dreadful suspense before giving your answer ? “Because I thought you might save enough in luncheons in that time to get married on.”” ‘HE reformer takes only the highest grounds, leaving the rich, low grounds to be cultivated by the practical politician. (permepa.) S'POSE it's all right, but I don't like the job 0’ guardin’ poor Beggars like they. I'd give up me Stripe an’ a couple 0’ Bob If they'd sent ‘em ALL out to Bombay ! 1 OUGHT to be thinkin’ 0’ Ome an’ Friends, (W’y don't 'e walk about?) For it's Christmas in England, an’ I intends— (‘E's let ‘is pipe go out!) Yes, I ought to be thinkin’ o’ Tiffin an’ Grog— (Now, ’as 'E got a fam'ly? Per'aps.) ‘Wake up! Oom Dutchey ; don’t sit like a log! It's CHRISTMAS! There'll maybe be Schnapps ! The Parmer ; YOU MAY REMEMBER THAT YOU FRIGHTENED MY TEAM LAST WEEK, AND SMASHED ME UP, AND 80 I THOUGHT I'D RIO A LITTLE SURPRISE FER YE, They're blowin’ the bugle, thank Gawd! in the Yard~ (Shall I tip’im “returns 0’ the day"? ) I ‘ope they'll be quick in relievin’ the guard ; This company AIN'T very gay! Well ; ’ere comes Relief. ’Ow that Corporal stamps (Eh, Sargent! I didn’t choke!) (Is there DUFF in them Concentration Camps?) o 6« « Guard’s relieved! —Merry Christmas, old Bloke! @. R. Bacon, comicbooks.com