Life — November 7, 1901 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HERE was once a young girl who was beautiful but not at all pro- gressive. She declined to serve on com- mittees, she did not belong to ono Woman's Club, and she had never even attended a convention. One day her mother, who was ambitious, was be- rating her daughter in such loud tones that she was overheard by the Presi- dent of the Maiden Aunts’ Conven- tion, who was passing the house. The Maiden Aunt rang the bell and inquired who was dulling the sensitive ear of the young person, and what the matter was. The mother, wishing to shield her daughter, said, ** I was scold- ing my daughter because she never stays at home. She belongs to nine executive committees and twenty-three women’s clubs, and is constantly pre siding at conventions in distant cities.” “Indeed,” said the Maiden Aunt, “if she can doall that, she shall marry my nephew. There are to be three delegation meetings this week that I shall be unable to attend, but I have the privilege of naming the Chairman I will appoint your daughter to pre- side, notifying her by postal, and if I hear good accounts of her, she shall marry my only nephew.” When the mother reported the con- versation, the daughter burst into tears. ‘I know him,’’ she sobbed, “the leads the German beautifully. What shall I do?” Just then three ladies were an nounced to see her. She wiped her eyes and went downstairs. They were three remarkable women. One had a fixed smile, one had a right band twice the size of the left,and one had the voice of a steam calliope. The latter announced, ‘* We are three sisters come to help you. We will in turn take your place at these meetings, on condition that you will invite us to your wedding and introduce us as your Maiden Aunts,”” The poor girl promised readily and waited for accounts of the meetings, After the reception of delegates from 373 The President of the Maiden Aunts came to call immediately after the ad- journment and brought her nephew. He confessed at once to the beautifal girl that he never would have thovght it of her, and they agreed to hasten their marriage. THE MEETING WAS BROVONT TO ORDER. Tullahohany, the newspapers were en- thusiastic over the winsome smile of the gracious Lady Chairman. The day after the quarrel in precedence be- tween the old and young Maiden Aunts of Elirion, they gave unstinted praise to the officer who wielded the gavel so effectually that the meeting was brought to order before the police had to be called in. The meeting of the Occidental Chapter was last, largest and most social, and the press could not contain its enthusiasm over the ringing tones that dominated the vast assembly. The bride did not forget to invite her faithful friends, and, after the ceremony, they came up to be intro- duced to the groom as her Maiden Aunts. “Where did she get that smile?'’ whispered the groom. “ Presiding,” answered the bride, Numb from the grasp of the second, he murmured : « Where did she get that hand?" * Presiding,’ whispered the bride. Half-deaf from the congratulations of the third, he asked : “ Where did sho get that voice?” comicbooks.com