Life — September 26, 1901 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“T Ite between the red and green.”” Crones, ‘Po distribute imbecility requires world-wid y, 80 thi And enormous perspicuity creates a vast vacuity by not dwelling in this town ! (He is led of by the city editor, while the band plays * Razzle Dazzle” (0 subdued groan. The dercishes dance the serpentine for a while and Sinaity fade away. A strain of muste now begins, and the bright young men of The Sun, headed by one Paul Dana, march in to rag-time.) man of great renown Soxa or “Tu * Youno Men, ‘The stars shine bright In the stilly night, And they're winking at the world in arrant fun, But we never, never care For their silly twinkling stare— It’s so so when you see it in The Sun! When the planets turn ‘There is much to learn There are truths untold within the spec- trum’s glow ; Yet this scientific fact Is at present quite intact : When you see it in The Sun, it isn’t so! (Paut’ Dana now steps forward in a costume much too large for him.) Sono or Onscurtty. I'm a colorless concoction of ubiquitous ; Paut Dana type that is My shade is neither yellow nor true blue, And even to refer to me as something quite iquitous: Is something no one ever thinks to do. When I first put this uniform on, I remarked, as I looked in the glass, “It's my highest ambition to obtain a position Which is never, never, never, never crass !"" I'm the culti of immense superiorit With an education much above a clam. In a strenuous endeavor [ have toiled since my minority Yet no one seems to know just who Tam! When I first put this uniform on, I remarked, as I gazed long at it, “How much, through digestion, I may swell is a question, But these shoes'll never, never, never fit!” Cores. Ife’s a colorless descendant of immense superiority, With a modicum of intellect and wit. But he strives, Alack! Alas! Never, never to be era And his shoes'll never, never, never fit! (A golemn funeral march ts now played, and a large part of the assemblage falls asieep, as White- fare Redd enters on a stuffed elephant drawn on ed. offspr “I'm the cultivated offspring of immense superiority.” wheele by the hired hands of Ophir Farm, Ho bows profoundly to right and ft.) Wuireraw Retro. le is soon told. ‘Tis a story that’s old, To be sung without any eva 80 allow me to say, Ina casual way, I'm seeking a good situation. I've written enough Political stuff To expect some pronounced No titbit would be Really relished by ne I'm seeking a good situ To Paris I went With the peaceful intent Of outdoing the whole Spanish nation. But the job was too small— Didn't suit me at all— What I want is a good situation ! ipensation. (All snore peacefully as he retires mumbling to Almself, The ghost of E. L. Godkin now floate in over the sleepers, and dances @ mournful minut tn the centre, He touches one of the Rldlers in the orchestra, who wakes grumbling and plays an accompaniment ) Sono or Desrain. E. L. Gopxty. I'm a spectre pessimistical and highly ego- tistical, and ever since from here 1 made my flight, comicbooks.com