Life — September 12, 1901 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHERE TO GO FOR THE SUMMER, Lawyers to Fee, Pa. Singers to Alto, Ga, Bakers to Cakes, Pa, Jewelers to Gem, Ind. Rabies to Brest, Mich. Smokers to Weed, Cal. Printers to Agate, Col. The sleepy to Gap, Pa. ‘The tule to Rust, Minn, Cranks to Pecullar, Mo. Poets to Parnassus, Ma, Deadheads to Gratis, 0. Thieves to Sac City, Ta, Mendicants to Begg, La. Perfumers to Aroma, Il), Small men to Digger, Ind. Panpers to Charity, Kan, Actors to Star City, Ark. Plumbers to Faucett, Mo. Old matds to Antiquity, O. Bankers to Deposit, N.Y. Aplarists to Beeville, Tex. Brokers to Stockville, Nev. Hunters to Deer Trail, Col Hacksters to Yellville, Ark. Prize fighters to Box, Kan. Lovers to Spoonville, Mich. Democrats to Dennis, Mass. Carpenters to Sawtooth, Id. Politiclans to Buncombe, Va. Sewing giris to Sciasors, Col, Dry goods men to Calico, Cal, The * boys” to Midway, S “Crooks * to Dodge City, T YEI99PRS AT NvLLy ‘Theosophists to Mystic, Swimmers to Neversink, N. Y. ‘oulterers to Hatchville, Ga, Puzzle flends to Riddleville, Ga. Phyaiclans to Doctortuwn, Ga. Whist players to Cavendish, Id. Topers to Brandy Station, Va. Soclety climbers to Tip Top, Va. School teachers to Larned, Kan. Pronlbitiontsts to Drytown, Cal, Drummers to Modest Town, Va. The hairless to Bald Knob, Ark. Entomotogists to Bug Hill, N, C Peregrinators to Footvilie, Wis. Pork men to Ham's Pratrte, Mo, Druggists to Balsam Lake, Wis. Baseball players to Ballground, Ga, Reigning beauties to Betlecenter, Q. Polllcal orators to Stamptown, Pa. The gum brigude to Chewtown, Pa, Ne'er. do-wells to Hard Scrabble, Ky, Justices of the peace to Squire, Mion. Three-card monte men to Trickum, Ky. Newly-married couples to Bilas, Mich, Summer Suggestions by Frank D. Goodhue, in the Comn- merciat-Tribune. IN one of his conversations with Augustus Hare, Chlet Justice Morris sald he was sitting on the bench ta Ireland, and after n case had been tried he said to the Jurymel + Now, to consider this matter, you will retire to your accus- tomed place," and two-thirds of them went Into the dock. Another time he said to a culprit: “1can produce tive wit- nesses who AAW you steal that cow, “ Yes," sald the prisoner, ‘bat I can produce five hun- dred who did not."— Argonaut. Tuy had been engaged, but bad quarreled, atsl were too proud to make up. Both were anxious to have people belleve that they had entirely forgotten each other. Mle called at her home one day to see her father—oa business, of course, She answered the doorbell, Satd he: “An, Miss Jepkio, I belleve. Is sour father inte “No, sir.” she replied, “father Is not In at pi bo you wish to see him personally “Ido,” he answered, feeling that she was yteiding, “oa very particular personal basiness,"” and he turned p: to gO away. “1 beg your pardon,” she cried after him, as he reached the lowest step, “ but who sball I say called ?°—A,sicers Tix had called on a Fifth Avenue physiclan, and reported that he was “ knocked out generally." As he took the pre scription, he sald Well, doctor, what do I owe you? “Two dollars,” “I'm sorry I can’t pay you to-day. walting a while, will you?” ; that's all right’ “ And, doctor, how much will this prescription cost! + About one dollar.” “Say, doc, you couldn't loan me a dollar to get it win, could you? I'm dead broke.” “Let me look at that prescription again,” wald the phy. siclan, Ie took tt, examined {t, and erased @ line. “Thad prescribed something for your nerve,” he said, “bat I see you don't need tt."—New York Times You won't mind Onaxor Crrizex: Did sou say he had on his Sanday clothes? Newanx Man: Yes, be bad on his golf sult. Yonkers Staterman For sale by all wadealers in Great Britain. The Inter- national News Company, Bream’s Building, Chancery Lane, 2 England, A¢ EUROPEAN AGENTS—Meaars. Brentano, 37 Avenue de l'Opera, Paris, Established ‘1823. WILSON WHISKEY. That’s THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., Baltimore, Md. For Sale FSTERBROOKS — 150 Varieties. STEEL P PENS Every Esterbrook Pen is all Stationers. Warranted. THE ESTERBROOK STEEL PEN CO, 26 Jans, Sv toi. | | All! LIFE. Vol. 36. Bound in Maroon and Gold, Green and Gold, Full Black. PRICE, $4.00. If Copies are returned an allowance of $2.00 is made. A Well-Built Gh Light-Weight Handsomely Finished Size, 16 feet by 82 Inch FOR $27 EL Paddling « w ot % Canoe SEND FOR CANOE CATALOCUE No. 5 LAUNCHES OF ALL KINDS A CATALOGUE } ES—CATALOGUE No. A. § . LAWRENCE RIVER SKIFFS— OLLOW SPARS—BOOKLET No. 4 HIGH-CRADE WORK RK ONLY THE SPALDING ST. LAWRENCE BOAT CO. J. @. FRASER, Manager. OGDENSBURG, St. Lawrence Co., N. Y. SHAKSPEARE SAID GOOD WINE IS A GOOD FAMILIAR = CREATURE. LET US MAKE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THE LABEL OF THE BEST GOOD WINE RUINART CHAMPAGNE Dneitticd hid, Bee AOOSEVTLT 8 SCAYLER, Sele gut be ha tid Ses Gta. 2.00 P. M. Leave New York; 4.00 Next Afternoon Reach Chicago—NEW YORK CENTRAL comicbooks.com