Life — May 23, 1901 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHAT KIND OF A GAME Is THIS? Harold and His Papa. oe Para, when is sister going to be married?” “ On the sixteenth.” “Will she have a large wedding?” “ Yes, Harold, avery large wedding.” “Why does she it a large wed- ding?” “For various reasons. One is be- cause she will receive more presents, and another because it costs money “ But she doesn’t have to spend the money, does she?” “Oh, no. That is exclusively your papa’s privilege.” , “Do you like to spend money on weddings, papa?" “No, my son, I do not. I despise it.” “Then what makes you do it?” “To keep up your mother’s position in society.” “But haven't you a position in society, also?” “*No, Harold. I’m merely the busi- ness end.”” **And would you care if mamma didn’t have a position in society?” “Yes, I would care a great deal.” “T am afraid I do not understand. Yon have to spend money to give mamma her position in society, don’t you?”’ “Yes.” ‘But you don't like to spend the 439 “And are you in the same category with him?” “Yes, Harold, he and I are in the same category with all the other men. Now run and play. Your papa must make some business calculations.” A* impudent fellow in Hawarden Inquired, without asking his pawarden, Of the learned Colquhoun if the man in the mquhoun Always lodged in some no- bleman’s gawarden ? Whereupon the fire-cating Lord Cholmondeley, Overhearing the words, re- marked grolmonde To an awe-stricken neigh bor, unsheathing his seighbor, That the question was beast- ly uncolmondeley. Spelbinder, money, yet you do like to give mamma her position in s0- ciety.” “My boy, you should be care- ful in your use of terms. You asked me if I would care, not what I would like to do, andI said I would care.”’ “But why should you care?” “Because I would rather work myself to death and give her what she wants than to do the other thing. There are worse things than death.” “Then you don't do it be- cause you want to, but because it can’t be helped?”’ “You area bright lad. You have guessed it.” “But where does _ sister come in?’ “«She comes in the same cate- gory with your mother.’ “What is a category?" “Well, Harold, when two people of one's own family are in the same category, it means that they are united against you.” “But sister is going to be united to another man, isn’t she?" ‘*The man thinks she is, but he will find out later that she is united against him.”” AN OLD ENGLISH faMPLeR. comicbooks.com