Life, 1899-07-27 · page 15 of 20
Life — July 27, 1899 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct pieces of humor: **"My Carrier Pigeons"** is a short poem about manuscripts reliably returning home—likely a writer's jest about their own work. **"An Absolute Necessity"** depicts a harried father at a domestic employment agency. Desperate to hire a nurse for his baby while his wife plays golf, he abandons his earlier pickiness and accepts "anyone." The satire targets both the childcare crisis (nurses were scarce) and the emerging leisure culture of wealthy women—golf being a fashionable but time-consuming pursuit that left domestic duties to hired help. His desperation underscores how dependent affluent families had become on domestic workers. **"The Penguins"** cartoon shows penguins relieved a gentleman "doesn't belong to our family"—likely satirizing some contemporary public figure through animal commentary, though the specific target is unclear without additional context. The bottom item discusses railroad economics between Boston and New York, apparently satirizing New York's self-interested exploitation of other cities.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
My Carrier Pigeons. Y manuscripts my carrier pigeons are, For if in sunny weather or in rain 1 send thom forth, let it be near or far, Thoy never fail roturning home again, An Absolute Necessity. TALL man, with heavy rings under his eyes and a slight bend for- ward, as if he were In the habit of carrying some heavy burden, rose quickly as the ludy in charge came forward, and, as sho shook ber head doubtfully, he sighed a heavy sigh. “This can’t go on much longer,” he said, dispiritedly. “I can’t stay but @ moment, as I have loft my cook in charge; but it seeins strange that you can’t get me a nurse,” Tho lady manager of the intelligence office smiled deprecatingly. “Of course,” she said, glibly, “I can Ret you a nurse, but you don’t want an ordinary person, You want some one to como in and take complete charge, and be responsible and all that, and I cannot get you such a woman right off; it may mean a couple of days.” Tho man who confronted her spoke almost passionately as he replied : “Madame, I was wrong. I was too particular. Forgive me, Get me a nurse. Anything—avyone, My busi- The M. PaTAL. 2 NOW, REMEMBER WHAT I BAY. The Penguins : THANK PROVIDENCE. HE DOPSN'T BELONG TO OUR FAMILY! ness is neglected, and I am afraid to bo too finicky any longer, Can you supply mo now?” “Certainly,” said the Indy managor. “But you didn’t talk this way yesterday. You wero very par- ticular then.” “T know I was,” replied tho tall man, “but I fool differently to-day, Irealizo now that I have got toget geome one at onco to take chargo of my baby AVOID EXCITEMENT. A SUDDEN S110CK TO YOU MAY PHOVE “ BE KIND EXOUGH TER REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU MAKE OUT YOUR BILL.” whilo my wife 18 learning to play golf.” Tom Masson, T is not believed in Boston that the New York Central Railroad has leased the Boston & Albany for the purpose of running it in the in- terest of New York. On the con- trary, itis asserted that grain can be put aboard ship materially cheaper in Boston than in New York, and Boston believes that the freight the Ccntral hauls for shipment will tend to seck the cheapest port, Nodoubt. Boston is right. New York attracts capital, but capital does not form so strong a personal attachment for New York as to seek to abstract nourishment from other cities for her benefit. New York is liked simply for what can be got out of ber. She is pleasant, and folks like to live in her, She is rich, and folks like to squeeze her. She does not, however, inspire the sort of sentimental regard which would in- duce acorporation to spend in her behalf money which could be used to better advantage in building up some other town,