Life — April 7, 1898 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘Sue is very frigid in her manner,” remarked. Willie Washington. “Perhaps,” was the reply, “but she has a heart of gold." “So [have been informed. But Iam tired of trying to cross a conversational Chilkoot Pass in order to redich it."— Washington Star, DECORATION-DAY TOUR TO GETTYSBURG, LURAY, AND WASHINGTON. ‘The Pennsylvania Railroad Compan has arranged for | LIFE CAPITOL PHILOSOPHY. One of the best-known characters about the hotel corridors of the National Capitol is an old colored man (black man would be literally true) who has known pretty nearly all the Washington- jans worth knowing for five decades and more. another of its popular seven-day personally-conducted | In one capacity or another he has been employed tours tot Washington, cial train Sa 4.00 from Phi 1d of Gettysburg, Luray Cavert York and Philadelphia by spe- Rate, $2 ww York: sary expenses, < from other points. and full information apply to ticket t Agent, 119 Broadway, New York: 780 v. J.; of Geo. W. Boyd, Assistant ladelpbia, n Adelbert undergradu- a few evenings ago, and f, carelessly dropped his small grip: tloor behind his feet. Presently the car be Most of the new passengers were girls, and as they came in one by one the Adelbert man crowded along a little and so got away fre his gripsack, There were at least half a dozen girls at bis left, and it was in that direc- tion that bis grip was loc Pretty soon t Adelbert man beth his hand to Un wasn't the reach it Then he str “Pardon count but Tha and hi ° in All be © was dainty boot heels, two of them badly run own. He reached a little further. Another boot heel. is begun to wriggle un ily. Upes the young man again, His countenan sack on th to fill up. ¢ car neared his stopping-place, and the aght himself of his baggage. He put foor—it wasn't there; that is, the grip He felt a little way to the lett—he couldn't inflamed der her , with a somewhat rip somewt me y Was still more inflamed, This time he arose to his “he murmured. Down he went and clawed along he muttere didn’t come. aid, “here it is.” it isn’t,” piped a shrill soprano. re was a brief struggle. and then the bashful youth realized that he had hold of the young woman's foot, He stood up at this with a despairing glare Perhaps the girls were moved to pity by his hopeless “Tve x pulled, but moment Jook, perhaps they didn't like the way the other passen- | gers were giggling soon produced th Anyway, they shuftted around and sing outh with the i from the car, —Cleveland Plain Dealer, scarlet face scoot ASHEVILLE AND HOT SPRINGS, N.C. | These two charming resorts, located in the mountains of Western North Carolina, are now being rapidly filled with winter tourists from the North. A more delightful place cannot be found to avoid the disagreeable March winds, They are easily reached from New York via Pennsylvania and Southern Railway by the Washington and Southwestern Limited, which leaves New York daily at 4.20 p.m., ng the trip within twenty-two hours in through Pullman drawing-room sleeping-cars, For full particulars, ete., call on or address Alex. S. Thweatt, Eastern Passenger Agent, 271 Broadway, N. Y, mal tarried a while in France, beautiful France; and there they visited a gaol. A gaol is much the same as a jail, but that is another story. Who,” they asked, is the prisoner with the tall, high forehead!” * That,” replied the guard, “is one who has been con- victed of treason.” “ And these others?" “These are those who knew him to be innocent.” In the corridor, just beyond, was a bronze statue of Justice, with a brass beefsteak bound over each eye. —Detroit Journal. OF course the; Prince of Wales's favorite wine, de LOSSY-HOLDEN CHAMPAGNE. and | “Ifyou don't where he has come into constant contact with men whose opinions have been quoted—and Uncle Eben remembers to quote them on all possible occasions. In the asked if we were Arlington the other evening he was ing to hav war with Spain. “T d’know ‘bout war, seh,” he began, in a non- committal way, ‘‘but dere ain't no sort o' danger of our honor sufferin’, No, seh, ’s long’s I've bin hyar dis gret country’s honor’s bin mighty well an’ cayr'd fo’. Some on us talk’s purty loud, some on us talk’s purty long, but dere’s some on us doan say much—an’ dey’s lookin’ after things de bes’. De ‘golden mean,’ dat’s it. One gen’le- man I knows well says ‘golden mean’s’ what does it, an’ I believes him.” “Why, asked his questioner. “Wall, Then after a moment's pause he added: what's the ‘golden mean,’ uncle?” it ain't doin’ too much uv enything.” “Now, take har fer a 'zample. Dere’s Samson, he got into trubil ‘cause he had his’n cut too short, an’ dere’s Abs‘lum, an’ he got into trubil ‘cause he didn’t have his'n cut short ‘nough,” As the to say: pup separated, lau “War er no war, we's all right s'long’s we stick fas’ to de golden mean.” His advice fs about as good as can be given, and the Uncle Eben builded better than he knew, man who trims his sails by that old Horatian wisdom stands the best chance of stecring his craft to success, It is—to change the metaphor— not going off at half-cock. All that helps you to that is to be sought after. Nor will anything clse help you to this more surely than will life insurance. Unwise expendi- ture is curtailed that the premiums may be met, | and at the same time that one is learning in this way proper economy and self-restraint, one is saving in the surest of banks a fund which will enable him to enjoy this good world all the more when he will best know how to enjoy it. In life insurance, however, as in all things else, there isa choice to be shown if one is to decide wise There are companics and companies, and some of them (as the little boy said of yesterd well—and that’s all green apples)}—‘ promised there is to say.” Among all the good companies, one is pretminently best, and to that one—to The Mutual Life Insurance Company of New York— you are invited to turn to-day for the surest help towards reaching the golden mean that Icads to success. hing, he was heard | CHOCOLATE JOWN EY’S sowsons LOWNEY"' on Every Piece Celebrated for their purity as well as for thelr delicious quabty ‘and deligbtful flavors. A TRIAL PACKAGE FOR 10 CTS, IN STAMPS, When aot to be bad of dealers we will send. on receipt of ke 11. Box, Ge,; 21b hox, $1.20; F1b, box, $1 be: livered Fren in the United States. Address all correspo THE WALTER M, LOWNEY CO., 98 Pearl St, Basin New York Retail Store. 1123 Broadway (25th St’) Boston Retail Store, 416 Washington St, UPHELD BY THE STRENGTH § MALT EXTRACT MAKES PEOPLE STRONG oUCcH & rirzcerh Newest Sensation for Luncheons. Minced Chicken highty seasoned with Mexican spices and res in corn husks in| eae ight mailed torlOe ip stan ‘stamps, Q/ARMOUR PACKING =: