Life, 1897-05-13 · page 7 of 20
Life — May 13, 1897 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Life Magazine Page 395 This page contains three distinct content pieces: **"Life's Offer" (top left):** A contest soliciting readers' votes on the ten best short poems in English. The accompanying photograph shows what appears to be a group of Victorian-era figures in period dress, likely illustrating a famous poem. **"My Only Hope" (center):** A humorous poem by Wallace Dunbar Vincent about moving day frustrations—crowded furniture, bulky belongings, and domestic chaos. It's relatable domestic satire with no specific political reference. **"Exercise Extraordinary" (right column):** An article praising a young man named Ned Obliging whose rigorous gymnasium training and physical conditioning have made him remarkably muscular and fit. **Bottom illustration:** A small cartoon labeled "Down on Their Uppers" showing two heads in profile, likely depicting poverty or worn-out shoes (a period idiom). The page is primarily literary and lifestyle content rather than political satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
- LIFE: LIFE’S OFFER. WHAT ARE THE TEN BEST SHORT POEMS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE? The original of this picture will be presented to the winner of Live's Pegasus” contest. E reproduce herewith the pic- ture which Lire will send to the one whose list of the ten best short poems comes nearest the com- bined popular verdict. The size of the picture is twenty by thirty inches and its value is $125. It will be hand- somely framed in gilt. Send in your list of what you con- sider the ten best short poems in the English language as early as pos- sible. The competition closes on July rst. All lists should be sent to ‘‘ Pega- sus,” in care of Lire. Not more than one list will be considered from each individual, . . . Not to be left behind in the guessing con- tests, LIFE offers a picture to the one who will ‘name the best ten short poems in the English tongue. The judge of the contest is to be “popular judgment,” though how Lire is going to obtain access to that usually inaccessible oracle is not told. —Syracuse Post. UITE easily. From all the lists received we will take the ten poems that are named the greatest number of times. This is the popular judgment, isn’t it? And the one whose list comes nearest to this will be awarded the priz MY ONLY HOPE. HE first of May has come and gone, and in our new abode The gaily painted moving-van has dumped its final load; O'er boxes, trunks and crates I've climbed, with most exceeding care, Until, by superhuman skill, I'm up the parlor stair. Two bureaus and a chiffonier before my vision loom, And they must be transplanted or I cannot reach the room; The only place to put them that my eager gaze can spy Is where a lot of bric-4-brac and kitchen fixtures lie. And now I find my best silk hat is battered out of shape, An oil-can fondly nestles in my wife's new velvet cape; From underneath the folding bed, that weighs a ton or two, Some remnants of the banquet lamp project themselves in view. Now, as I gaze, a vision comes of happy days and nights Employed in that delightful game of Put-the-things-to-rights; And, s I doff my coat and cuffs, most earnestly I pray That we'll be wholly settled ere we move again—next May ! Wallace Dunbar Vincent, 395 EXERCISE EXTRAORDINARY. ED OBLIGI had always been a weak, puny youthling, and his anxious parents spared no labor or ex- pense in order to find some means of preparing his muscles for life’s enormous physical demands. Obliging, senior, consulted a number of brawny-chested men of doubtful moral character, as well as divers consumptive-looking professors of hygiene and physical culture. “Send him to my gymnasium for a couple of quarters,” said one of the former, grandiloquently; “the horizontal bars and punching- bags will soon fix him up in good shape.” “1 would suggest a course of my pro- toplasmic carbo-hygienical treatment,” said the spectacled professors unani- mously. ‘The large and beautifully bound and superbly illustrated volume, containing full directions for acquiring health and vigor: after nature's own fashion, is absolutely necessary to your son. only a nominal one—ten dollars for the book alone, or eleven dollars including my professional services for a whole month. A careful study of the pages of this mighty volume will enable your son to so diet and exercise, that he cannot fail of obtaining a new lease of life.” Yet, somehow or other, the elaborate gymnasium courses and diligent poring over mighty tomes of scientific wisdom had not the desired effect. But in the past twelvemonth, without any cost whatsoever, except for liniment and lint, Mr. and Mrs. Obliging have noted with joy the marvelous physical development of their only son. Ned can now run like a frightened deer, his arms are as muscular as a blacksmith’s, and his lungs all-powerful. The fact is, Ned Obliging has taught no less than twenty-seven females—of every imagi- nabl fe and weight—how to ride their bicycles. Percie W. Hart. 1 am its author, and the cost is ON THEIR UPPERS. comicbooks.com