Life, 1896-11-19 · page 13 of 18
Life — November 19, 1896 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"The Thief and the Policeman on Bicycles"** (translated from Paris's *Figaro*): This French dialogue-based cartoon mocks honor among criminals. A policeman chases a thief—both on bicycles. They engage in a competitive discussion about gear ratios while racing. When the thief's tire punctures and he's caught, he protests it's dishonorable to arrest someone who's broken down. The policeman, swayed by this twisted logic, helps repair the bicycle so they can race fairly again. The satire targets absurd codes of conduct and how easily principle bends to appeals to vanity. **"Theory and Practice"**: A short poem by H.L. Preston contrasts moral instruction with hypocrisy. A banker (Smith) teaches Sunday school children not to steal, then immediately uses another man's (Jones's) railroad pass fraudulently—demonstrating that the wealthy ignore their own preached morality. **"A Serious Matter"**: Life mocks New York newspapers (particularly the *World*) as so filled with filth that even bacteria refuse to decompose them, sarcastically suggesting this moral degradation is literally indestructible.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
SHOWY PLAYER. ys little story from the Paris /ugaro seems too good for the readers of Lire to miss, so we give it in the original: CONFRATERNITE ou . LE VOLEUR ET LE GENDARME A BICYCLETTE. LE GENDARME (monté sur sa bicyelette, il pédale avec rage d la pour- suite d'un poleur qui, a bicyclette lui-méme, senfuit sur la routes les deux bicyclistes sont pres Uun de Uautre; UVacharnement redouble des deux parts).— Je crois que je te tiens! (Dans un emballement suprime, il fait du quarante” et va touche presque Uadversaire.) Le voLeuR, pédalant, courdbé sur sa machine.—Pas encore ! DARME.—On va voir... Le VoLeur.—Vois! (Un coup de pédale d'une vigueur inouie le pousse a dix métres du gendarme.) Le GENDARME.—Le b... m’échappe ! Lr voteur.—Ah! ah! LE GENDARME, Aaletant.—Tu dois développer plus que moi...sans ga je te rattraperais (U1 perd du terrain.) Le VOLEUR, /aconigue.—Peut-ctre. Le GENDARME.—Sor... Qu’est-ce que tu développes? Le voLeur.—Cing quatre-vingts LE GENDARME.—Moi, cing a pe du terrain de plus en plus.) Le voLeur.—Tu as tort de parler a bicyclette.. Mauv: Le GENDARME.—Ah je développais cing quatre- toi... tu n’en ménerais pas large brusguement.) Qu'es ... Tu n’as pas de merite. CU perd ingts comme « (Apercevant le voleur qui ralentit ce qui tarrive?... (// se hdte.) Le voLeur.—Flambé! Mon pneu vient de crever... (Md est forcé de S’arréter.) > Le GeENDARME.—Tu es pris, mon vieux. (// dui met la main au collet.) Le voLEur, digne.—On n'appelle pas cela prendre quelqu'un. Si mon pneu ne s’était pas crevé, ta ne m'aurais jamais attrapé. (Avec uncertam mépris.) Moi, je rougirais d’arréter quelqu’un dans ces cunditions-la. Ce n'est pas chic. Le GENDARME, fouché dans son amour-propre de bicyeltste.—Tuas raison. Je vais t'aider a regonfler ton pneu et on recommencera. La loyauté avant tout. Le VoLeuR, ¢mu.—Vous avez vraiment une Ame de bicycliste!...(// dui serre la main. Puis le gendarme et te voleur, tout en causant records, réparent la machine, Aprés quoi, la course continue loyalement...) ALFRED Capus, in Le Figaro. 381 THEORY AND PRACTICE. HOU shalt not steal,” Smith, banker, said In Sunday school, And shook his head Before his class. Next day, aboard A Pullman car, Proud as a Icrd, He rode afar On Jones's pass. H. L. Preston. A SERIOUS MATTER. T appears that: Professor Martens, director of the institute for the examination of paper at Charlottenburg, made a scientific examination of the paper used in about ninety-seven modern reviews, and of these ninety-seven only six were found that could be guaranteed to last for a long period: the greater part would certainly decay during the first century of their existence. This is indeed serious. We had hoped that most of the stuff printed in America would decay more rapidly. If the material on which certain New York dailies are printed could decay before it reached the hands of the purchaser it would be a splendid thing for the community. Possibly the filth of the subject matter of the Mew Yerk World, for instance, is too offensive for the destroying bacilli, which, after all, may have a sense of smell.