Life — August 27, 1896 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

od the home- 4 four out ike to ance urke f. it into The Ypetlantt Trade Mark ts stamped on every garment, Q, Lock at tt now—look for t when you purchase >YPSILANTI Union Suits For Gentlemen. /f 7 The perfection of health pro- tective underwear. It fits 60 well you only know you have tton, because you are 80 com- fortable. Endorsed by all phy- to Wear 2." Free. HAY & TODD MFG. CO., Ypsilanti, Mich, LOVE AND LONG DISTANCE. She lived in Chicago and he lived in Hoboken. Cupid can thrive almost anywhere. The distance from Hoboken to Chicago is, let us say, 1,000 miles. Long-distance telephone rates are $1 a hundred uiles for five minutes, That makesa five minutes’ x with Chicago, $to, Oh, love i_ oh, rapture! As she walked trippingly along Wabash Avenue » Chicago, thinking of Harold and Hoboken, her uttering heart was startled by her eyes falling on one of those famihar long-distance telephone signs, consisting principally of a blue bell. Ordinarily a bluebell reminds one of Scotland, but in this case it reminded her of Hoboken. Ob, Harold!” she twittered, all to her dear little self. ** Oh, Harold 1" Then, without further explanation except to so- liloquize just once as follows: ‘How perfectly tghted he will be to hear from me in this unex- ected manner, the dear old darling 1" she went into the telephone box and rang up Hoboken. Harold came up with it, and for ten minutes her heart went whirling along the wires to Harold's heart, and Hoboken and Chicago were one. Then she rang off ard went to her home, so happy, so happy, that even the Chicago atmos- phere was full of sunshine to her. Ten minutes of bliss with Harold. Why had they never thought of this before ? Now every day they would commune together, and life would be joy unutterable. They would talk for hours instead of minutes. Oh, bliss! And Harold? h, Harold was in the ecstasies of an elysiac t comes only to happy lovers. ‘That is to say, he was untila man came with a Just what it said in detail Harald did not know. All that he knew was that he had been conversed with for ten minutes at the rate of $2. minute. In an instant the whole world seemed changed to him, He looked at the man with the bill in dull de- spair. He remembered the conversation, The man seemed to understand, and promising to call the next day, he went out softly. The next day Harold had disappeared forever. The next day the man with the bill called. The next day Chicago could not get Hoboken, And it cost the girl $20 and her Harold. —New York Sun, Pouice Captain (to lieutenant): We can con- gratulate ourselves now on having closed up every gambling house in town, LieuTENANT: That's so, When do you think we'd better begin to raid them over again ? — Roxbury Gazette, PRUDENTIAL HAS THE _ ee ea Assets over $15,780,000, Income $12,500,000. Surplus $3,300,000. A LIFE INSURANCE POLICY ISSUED BY The Prudential is vastly more important to the welfare of a family than is Gibraltar to the British pire. The Prudential insures men, women and children. Write for descriptive literature. . 2. 6 6 2 e ee ee THE PRUDENTIAL INSURANCE COMPANY OF AMERICA. JOHN F. DRYDEN, President. Home Office: NEWARK, N. J. MILWAUKEE BEER 19 FAMOUS PABST HAS MADE IT _SO comicbooks.com