Life — April 30, 1896 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

FROM THE OFFICE BOY. SHE smiles while that prosy old duffer dictates, s 9 She smiles when the baldheaded partner comes in And talks of his coughs and his colds; e She smiles at the clerk while she clicks her machine, saa eae American Cut Glass But never a smile or a laugh for me— | $ e ‘They have whiskers and I have none. ‘ A: A Gia I have plenty of brains, and I know a good deal, Special ttention en to the I could give his nibs points on the law; 1 could teach that old clerk for the next twenty years, Designs of Fitting out of Yachts. Sets of I could tell him some things, but—oh, pshaw | What's knowledge and brains to a girl nowadays ? o : ‘They ain't in it when all's said and done. Club Flags, a Glassware The idiots get all her smiles and her thoughts— They have whiskers and I have none. Monograms z i Made —New Ye Ye | y New York World. | AND Tue editor of a London evening daily was noted for his | Initial promptitude and tendency to rush things. He was contint- | nitials i ally impressing upon his reporters the necessity for condens- Cabinets ing news. There came into the office one morning a notice of Eneraved a ternfic explosion on board a big ship at Portsmouth. “If > : pee AND you catch the next train," he said to one of his men, ‘‘ you will : ees neieby too gad'cia' wit reneting for.eate | OT Etched. te Racks, edition, but boil it down.” The message came in due time. It said: ‘Terrific explosion, Melpomene. Boiler empty. 5 Engineer full. Funeral to-morrow. No flowers."—Wave, C. Dorflinger & Sons, MARK, ¥ Mamma: You know, Johnny, when mamma whips her Y 915 Broapway, (near 21s¢ St.,) little boy, she does it for his own good. NEW YORK. Jouxxy : Mamma, I wish you didn't think quite so much of me.—#oston Transcript. it’s a Wise Nurse that speeds the recovery of her patients by giving them alicNidtuined “Chip’s” oe Old Wood —the food drink. It contains the greatest amount of Teal nu- Cuts triment and is strength-giving and flesh-building. Invaluable to nursing mothers, consump- Another collection of quaint and tives and sufferers from wast- amusing sketches by F. P. W. ing diseases. BELLEW (“Chip”). Large Quarto, To be had at all 9% x 12, on plate paper, handsomely Druggists’ and Grocers’. bound. Prepared by Pr ice, $1.00. Anheuser-Busch Brewing Ass’n, St. Louis, U. S. A. For sale by all booksellers, or will be sent postpaid to any address, on receipt Send for handsomely illustrated colored of price, by the publishers. booklets and other reading matter. ER a eT Gas R. H. Russell & Son, 234 and 27 Vest Street, New York City. i oboten N GENERAL AGENTS. LING CO., ae 443 Atlantic Ave., Brooklyn, N.Y. J 33 Rose St., New York-