Life — June 27, 1895 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

z || Good Health ROSY CHEEKS WELL-ROUNDED FORM BRIGHT EYES: SHARP APPETITE GOOD DIGESTION You can gain them and keep them by using Pabst Malt rxtract— The “Best” Tonic “Best” Tonic ts a pure, health- " . It in better than ——S—SS Five little books—worth read- ing. worth getting, worth keeping =mailed on request. Ment this publication Address, Pabst Sia gain @9 BEARING THIS NAME ARE THE nomena’ GEL Best furnisher keeps them. Fifty cents and upwards. Cheaper model at 2 Look for “graduated” cord and the name on every pair. CHESTER SUSPENDER CO., - No. 7 Decatur Avenue, ROXBURY, MASS. Its Like_. This. You want a bercle!_ You're fot the money to mabe ibe payment. You you anes 9 BEAT CORD’ 4 MAKES THEM SO. cents. Sample pairs maile¢ for MOI 77O {aos a wheel that bas ‘and bet found wasting. The « WAVERLEY ‘prominent riders. INDIANA BICYCLE CO., Indianapolis, 1nd., U.S. A. NOTICE. SUBSCRIBERS TO “LIFE” will please give old address as well as new when requesting change of LIFE BINDER. Cheap, Strong and Durable. Will hold 26 number's. Matled to any part of the United States for $1.00, postage free. Address Office of “LIFE.” same, 19 West Thirty-First St, New York, From Omaha comes a story that is amusingly char- acteristic of the enterprise of the suburban real estate dealer. It seems that a farmer came into town the other day, called at an agent’s office, and said that he wanted to trade his farm for sume city lots. “All right,” the dealer replied ; * get into my buggy and I'll drive you to see some of the finest residence sites ,in the world—water, sewers, paved streets, cement sidewalks, electric light, and shade trees.” They drove on for several miles, getting pretty far out into the country. The agent's horse went fast, and his tongue still faster as he expatiated upon the beauty of the surroundings, the convenience of the location, its proximity to the city, the abundant means of com- munication, the improvements made or projected, and the certainty of a rapid increase in the value of the lots. He had reached the middle of his oration when he incidentally asked his companion— “Where did you say your farm was ?”” ‘Oh,” the other answered, “we passed it coming out here, It's about two miles nearer town,”— Munsey's Magazine. ZANGWILL, the novelist, rarely reverts to humor in his stories, but he is a rare judge of it, nevertheless. ‘It was in Perth,” he writes, “that, puzzling over a grimy statue, I was accosted by a barefooted newsboy, with his raucous cry of ‘Hair-r-ald, Glasgow Hair-r-ald 1” lll take one,” quoth I, *if you tell me whose statue this is,” «Tis Rabbie Burns,’ replied he, on the nail. ‘Thank you,’ said I, taking the paper. ‘And what did he do to deserve the statue ?" “My newsboy scratched his head, Perceiving his embarrassment, a party of his friends down the street called out in stentorian chorus: ‘Ay, ‘tis Rabie Burns.’ “But what did he do to deserve the statue? I thundered back. They hung their heads. At last my newsboy recovered himself—his face brightened. “+ Well,’ said I again, ‘ what did he do to deserve this statue ?’ “He deed !' answered the intelligent little man.” A YOUNG lady with a touch of tonsilitis was consult- ing the family physician. “That is nothing serious,” said he. ‘I'll touch it up witha little nitrate of silver and you will be all right.” The young lady looked a bit doubtful. “Oh, it won't hurt,” remarked the doctor, reassur- ingly. “TL wasn't thinking of that, Papa might object.” “Why, what possible objection can he have 2” “+1 heard him tell mamma the other evening that he was opposed to silver. Couldn't you use nitrate of gold. Silver is so common and cheap, you know, and Tam sure papa wouldn't object then."—San Fran- cisco Post. OW a recent missionary Sunday at one of the largest Presbyterian churches in Philadelphia, the pastor preached on the distress of the heathen and the bene- ficent influence of Christianity. A practical business man was moved to place a dollar in the collection, After the service he waited around to speak to the pastor, When he had secured his attention, he said: “Pastor, I gave a dollar to the foreign mission this morning, but I was so impressed by your description of the condition of the heathen races that I would really like to have them get the benefit of that dollar.” ‘The pastor looked up inquiringly, and the man added: “Here is ten dollars to pay the expenses of getting the dollar over there."—Argonaut. AN Irish street car conductor called out shrilly to the passengers standing in the aisles : “Will thim in front plaze to move up, so that thim behind can take the places of thim in front, an’ lave room for thim who are nayther in front or behind ?” —Harper's Bazar,