Life — March 14, 1895 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: How near General Slocum came once to arrest as a common swindler will bear telling, for nobody enjoyed the incident in recollection better than he did, He and General McMahon were on their way home to New York from an inspection ‘of the Soldiers’ Home at Dayton, Ohio, and stopped at Philadelphia for breakfast. While waiting at the station for the signal to board their special car, McMahon observed a man whom he thought he recognized as an acquaintance, and, being of a social turn, approached him and shook hands cordially, saying : “How do you do, Mr. —” Bradford,” obligingly interjected the stranger. * Of New York, if 1 remember,” continued McMahon, affably. ‘0, of Bryn Mawr,” responded the stranger. Ah, yes; Bryn Mawr. I had forgotten. Glad to see you. When did you get to town ? Just then Slocum came up. He bad caught the name and recollected a Brad- ford who had served in his command during the war. ‘Why, hello!” he exclaimed, with effusion. ‘* Delighted to see you. My name is Slocum. You're Bradford, of Bryn Mawr. Knew you well during the war. It isn't possible you have forgotten me ? Bradford, meanwhile, had edged toward a policeman in the depot. ‘I can't say, Mr. Slocum, that I remember you or your friend,” said he, ‘‘and I don't pro- pose to join you in any kind of a game this morning. ‘The facts, I knew you th to be confidence operators from the first moment I saw you.” The policeman, who had evidently caught on, made a grab for the two gener- als, who made a simultaneous rush for the special’ car. It was just about moving off. As they scrambled on board the policeman dashed for the telegraph office, but the car made no stop within the jurisdiction of the Phi'adelphia police and the fugitives escaped,—Kate Field's Washington. A DRAMATIC incident of the recent Davis-Thompson wedding, which took place at Secretary Carlisle's house, has just transpired. The Secretary, who dearly loves a joke—on someone else—has done much to keep the affair a secret. But a joke, like murder, will out, and here is the joke, It seems that in the Carlisle parlor the time of day is told by a beautiful cuckoo clock. “The wedding ceremony was to begin promptly at twelve. To give notice to the guests to assemble in the parlor young Carlisle so arranged the clock, he thought, as to strike twelve at ten minutes ahead of time. But he must have made some miscue. Twelve o'clock came, but the clock was silent. After a few moments the time was noticed, and the guests were verbally informed that the time had arrived. A little later there was a rustle of skirts and the bridal party appeared. The ciergyman opened his ‘book when all was still, though he had solemnly failed to notice that Secretary Carlisle had not come.” Clearing his throat, the clergyman began : “+ Dear brothers and sisters.” We are assembled here to-day to—" He got no further just then. A bur-r-r from the clock interrupted him. It was followed. by the sound of the falling clock door, and then, just as the di: The Best Dressmakers are using Bias Velveteen Skirt Binding The Redfern said on irl guaranteed. Indestructible, if'bot for sale by th Boas UIE OY ALFRED C. KEMPER bi o% s: 38 Oxford. a brand of jrinchew Toxpox: 98 Oxtor fished Secretary of the Treasury entered the room. the litte bird came out of its jole, and then there fell upon the ears of those who crowded the handsome par- lors, twelve repetitions of : ** Cuckoo.” The Secretary, for the first time in many years, turned red. The groom grinned and the bride smiled. A suppressed titter broke the spell, however, and the clergyman, releasing his lip from his teeth, proceeded without further inter- ruption to the end.—Evening Wisconsin, “DR. BARRETT was a great friend of a brother Fellow, Magee, afterwards Bishop of Raphoe, and finally Archbishop of Dublin, who was grandfather of the late Archbishop of York, and was the only person’ to whom Barrett ever lent money. He wanted a loan of five pounds, and went to see Rarrett in his rooms, who agreed to make the loan, went into his bedroom, and returned with an old stocking full of guineas in his hand. Just as he came into the room the stocking burst and the guineas were scattered on the floor. Magee stooped down to help Barrett to pick them up. “+ Stop, stop, Magee!’ said he. ‘Do you see me now; get up and stand on that table and I'll pick them up." The loan was then made, and Magee left him counting the guineas. “A few days afterwards he met him and said, ‘I hope, Barrett, you found your guineas all right ?* +" Well, do you see me now,’ said Barrett, ‘they were all right but one. One was gone; and maybe it rolled into a mouse-hole, Magee, and maybe #2 didn't.’ —Outlook, A PoRTLAND man who has just returned from a hunting trip in the forests of northern Maine vouches for the entire trutl of the following story, as he had in direct from the Sheriff. ‘A man who lives in Mount Katahdin region went into the office of a Justice of the Peace a few days since and inquired “about the penalty for hunting deer with dogs, and very particularly as to whether one-half the fine did not go to the informer. The Justice consulted the game law, and assured him that it did. “Very well,” said the man, ** I want to complain of myself and settle." The Justice could not back out, and so gave the transgressor ‘a clean bill of health” upon payment of one-half of the penalty. Tt seems that the man got wind of the fact that the game warden had got the “drop” on him on his deer poachings with the dogs, and was only waiting an opportunity to arrest him. Hence his shrewd bit of diplomacy.—Zestern Argus. Mrs. McSwar: Is it right for us to be buying tickets for a morning performance ? Mk. McSwat: Why not ? * Because at this season we ought to spend the money for the benefit of the ie ‘That's what we're going to do Lobelia. You'll see some of the poorest actors at that play this afternoon you ever saw in your life."—Ex. 34 Makes a picture this size, equare, dor fancy shape. "Takes 2 pct: Jonding, snapshot ortime 4 tthe Camern is Tra laches carry in your pocket wer bronze Gniah. The Kombi, complete, %O. “Strip of tlm oS exposures) Canta extra. “Cost of develoning f film, 15 cents; cost for printing, 1 Cent for each pletare. Any boy oF ane, it Eons dealer sent post er, CHIcaco the famous y Samples and Booklet on * How to Bind the Dress Skirt.” for 2c. stamp. Address P. 0. Box 699, New York. Dress Stays are the Best. A Ready for Spring. 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