Life — December 29, 1892 — page 42: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Time. was when the papers were full of jocase references to that oyster in the stew at the parish social ; and now net aword do we hear about that oyster. Can it be that the parish stew is now utterly oysterless }—Boston Transcrin. Tue REV. MR. BINGO (wrestling with the turkey) : Maria, have you been trying to sharpen this carving knife? Mrs. Binco: I have, dear. I did the best I knew how with The Rev. Mr Binco: Then I take back everything I said in the grace.— Brooklyn Life. Mrs. Huckster (at the reception): Iam surprised to see you looking so thin, Mr, Leezer. Sty son George spoke of you the other day as feeling quite ru Miss HUCKSTER (so artlessly) : thy, no, mamma! Don't you recollect 2 What George sad was that Mr, Leezer ‘told him he was feeling pretty rocky.—Chicago Tribune, Sie: What is that awful noise ? He: Guess it’s the clambake over on the island. SUE: Poor thing! how the clams must be tortured te make them screech like that.—Binghampton Republican, ? “|My hired man was kicked in the stomach by a hone, stung by a swarm of homets and run over by a mowing machine one day and died the next.” 1 What was the cause of his death 2” ** Nervous prostration."—Cleveland Town Topics. “My dear,” said Mr. Bunker to his wife, ‘t what has be- come of that box of cigars you gave me on my birthday ?” * Itis upstairs.” “Well, get it, please. Jimmie wants to smoke, and | think we can give him all he wants in about three seconds.” —Harper's Basar. “ L was getting measured for a suit of clothes this mawn- it id young Mr. Sissy to his pretty cousin, ‘and just joke, y'know, | awsked Snipem if it really took nine tailors to make a man. He said it would take more than nine tailors to make a man of some people. 1 thought it was quite clevah."—Exchange. Twynn: I headed off Bawler nicely at the Cumso's last night. ‘TRIPLET: How did you manage it? Twynn : He was determined to sing ‘ Thy Sentinel Ara The General: 1 WAVE BEEN IN ENGAGEMENTS WITHOUT NUMBER, MY 1," but I took him off to a comer and explained that there DEAR. wasn't a solitary person in the company who had any eat for music, and that it was a pity to display his great talents She: OM, GENERAL, AND NOT A SINGLE BREACH OF PROMISE CASE ? Wines Gaeeasue auiee “Daven Outer SCRIBNER’S FOR CHRISTMAS is the most beautiful example of an American Magazine. The Frontispiece is a fac-simile of a water color drawing made for the Magazine by the famous French Artist, Marchetti. The Illustrations of which 30 are full page, represent the following artists : PUVIS DE CHAVANNES, HAUS, . H, BLASHFIELD, S SHIRLAW, E. E. SIMMOD . BECKWITH, q . . REID, - LENEPREN, s . L. DODGE, BLANC, z G. W. MAYNARD, CABANEL, : F, G. ATTWOOD, BONNAT, x N COX, Ww. T. SMEDLEY, GALLAND, ALB. i WILL H. Low, ARBO, C. S. REINHART, and Orners, The Writers represented are : THOMAS BAILEY ALDRICH, ARCHIBALD FORBES, GEO, A, HIBBARD, WILL H. LOW, S, BRISCOE, H, H. BOYESEN, OCTAVE THANET, F. D. MILLET, JULIA C, R: DORR, E. S, MARTIN, KENYON COX, S. R. DE MEISSNER, H.C. BUNNER, GEORGE W. CABLE, ann Oruens, Price, 25 Cents. For a Christmas Present nothing could be better than a subscription, $3.00 a year. Charles Scribner’s Sons, New-York. comicbooks.com