Life — May 21, 1891 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: RS AT Mills GS SINK OR SWIM. “THE Winter girl for months has reigned, But now her beauty waxes dim ; Her power is waning, soon she'll find That she must either sink—or swim. —New York Herald. Tue boy's fishing pole was fastened under the roof of a tree on the river bank yesterday, and he was sitting in the sun playing with a dog. “ Fishing 2” inquired a man passing along the road, “* Yep," answered the boy as briefly. ** Nice dog you've got there. What's his name ?” Fish.” sh? That's aqueer name for a dog. What did you call him *'Cause he won't bite.” Then the man proceeded on his way.— Washington Star. PResiveNt of STREET Rattway: We are greatly in need of improvements in the cars and buildings of the company, but I don’t know where the money is to come from. ‘The company is poor. SUPERINTENDENT: [tell you what the company might do. row from the conductors.— Amer ica. Bor- ‘Tue wife and @affghter of a captain who is himself a man of edu- cation and who commands one of the largest ships owned in America, not long since accompanied him on a trip during which he visited various Russian ports. The mother is a woman of no cultivation, and her daughter unfortunately seems to have more of her mother in her than of her father. On their return to America, a lady who was calling on Mrs. Captain X. began toask about the different ports which the ship had visited ; but soon found that she could elicit htvle information. “*T can't say that I noticed much,” Mrs. X. would reply. ‘*1 don’t seem to remember much about all those places.” ** But at least you must remember St. Petersburg,” the caller said. “* You were there a week, your husband told me.” “Oh yes, | remember St. Petersburg,” was the reply, ‘It was there that Sadie and I finished our silk quilt. We just worked like beavers all the time we were in port, so that we could begin a new one when we started for home.""—Soston Courter. A GooD many years ago, in Greene County, Ill., the Democratic party was divided, was badly split, and a politician was asked : ++ What divides the Democratic party ?" “Well,” said he, ‘there was an election for constable, and Joe Johnson was a candidate,” and, says he, ‘the party is now divided between those who voted for Joe Johnson and are ashamed of it, and those who voted for Joe Johnson and don't care ad—.'"—Agronaut, Quizzer: Why, there's a doctor in every other house on this street! How on earth do they all live ? FRANKLEE: They! Mercy! I've been wondering how we manage it, Pharmaceutical Era, SoorHinG AND REFRESHING are characteristics commending FLANDRAU & CO. Packer's Tar Soap FOR Bath and Shampoo. CELEBRATED HATS, —AND— Ladies’ Round Hats and Bonnets and The Dunlap Silk Umbrella. 378 & 180 Fifth Avenue, bet. 22d and 234 Sts., and 18: Broadway, near Cortlandt St. NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. 914 Chestnut St., Phila. G37 Agencies in all Principal Cities. Gold Medal Awarded, Paris Exposition, 1889. Piso’s Remedy for Catarrh is tho Best, Easiest to Use, and Cheapest. CATARRH Sold by druggists or sent by mail. b0c,_E. T. Hazeitine, Warren, Pa. FOR FIFTY VEARS MES. WINSLOW'S SOOTHING SYRUP for fifty years has heen used by millions of mothers for their Children while Teething. It soothes the Child, Softens the Gums, Allays all 372, 874, 876 Broome St., and Broadway, 51st St.& 7th Avenue. Elegant Spring and Summer CARRIACES FOR TOWN AND COUNTRY. Lowest Prices for Prompt Cash at Both Repositories. ALL NOVELTIES IN WOOD OR PAINT FOR ONE OR TWO HORSES. Variety of Second-Hand Vehicles, PEYCHAUD BITTERS “PAR EXCELUENCE.” Established In 18: UNSURPASSED FOR COCKTAILS AND TO FLAVOR CHAMPAGNE. S HERRY, &c. AS A TONIC IT HAS NO EQUAL. at all first-class ct HAVE YOU TRIED ““Whiting’s Standard Writing Paper-and Envelopes” made by Whiting Paper Co., Holyoke, Mass? You will find them the best for correspondence and all the uses of polite pain, Cures Wind Colic, and is the best remedy for Diarthera Rott EDENIA AND Goya laily. society. Cream and Azure, rough and smooth finish, all sizes. Ask your stationer for ‘‘ Whiting Standard.” comicbooks.com