Life — December 4, 1890 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LEFE - QUESTIONINGS. ATER WORDSWORTH. MET a little cottage girl “And what is an agnostic, pray?” Eighteen years old, she said, “ Sweetheart, ‘I do not know.’” Her brain was tired with the whirl She turned her pretty head away— Of questions in her head. “To Vassar I must go!" She asked me: ‘* What's an ‘ optimist 2°” ** Please don't, until you've answered me “Good luck made flesh !” [ cried. One question, you've asked four "— “And what, then, is a pessimist?” “* My little wife, dear, will “ Bad luck personified !" you be? Lask for love, not lore With that she asked me to explain A Christian scientist. Said 1: “He's one who cures a pal That doesn’t quite exist.” Five years ago to-night, my cyes ! I hear a sweet voice croon A lullaby, while Tommy cries, “* But what iz in the moon?” THWARTED. | | EAD OF FIRM: Oh, by the way, Mr. Travers, | shall have to ask you to stay in the ~ office all day next Wednesday ; 1 am going out of town, TRAVERS (asede): Hang the luck! That is the very day | had arranged tolhave my grandmother die. MORGENHLUM TELLS THE: —__ STORY AND IT RUNS THUS: 1 IF the Sioux Indians are not careful they may find themselves in the Siouxp. VAS PREPIN' TROO DE CURTAIN YUST PEFORE IT RINGED OOF AT DER LAST PERFORMANCE OF DEK HAST SIDE TRAMATIC CLUI, VEN ALL. TROO DER HOUSE DERE VENT UP A SHOUT OF * MORGENHLUM Tf MORGENBLUM Now How Vas vat? LKNOWED Vos rorUuLaRK, HUT HOW DID DEY KNOW DAT IT VOS ME DAT Vos) PEEVIN' TROO bE CURTAIN? Dor's vot L can't. MakR OUT I" THE NEW-BORN. YOUNG ZEREDER WAS INSPECTING THE NEW-HOKN RABY FOR THE FIRST TIME, AND IS) DICTUM He SAID, WITHOUT ENTHUS SIASM, SHUT DM SORKY IT AIN'T A PARROT,” Waar WAS AS FOLLOWS : “1D S'ROSE IT'S NICE ENOUGH, WHAT THERE IS OF 17," FIER AUDIENCE SAW, comicbooks.com