Life, 1889-11-14 · page 12 of 16
Life — November 14, 1889 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Satire on This Life Magazine Page The page contains several unrelated satirical pieces typical of early Life magazine: **"Want a Shine, Boss?"** mocks economic inequality—a poor boy offers shoe shines while a wealthy man questions whether he needs one, suggesting the rich are oblivious to poverty. **"Couldn't Afford to Reform"** jokes that a boy smokes cigarettes (rather than more expensive cigars) due to poverty, satirizing moral reform efforts that ignore economic reality. **"The Lay of the Ancient Coryphee"** (by Clarence Hyde) uses an aging ballet dancer to lament generational decline. She reminisces about the "Black Crook" era (1860s theatrical hit) when wealthy "swells" frequented shows and patronized dancers, but modern young men neglect the theater—social commentary on changing leisure habits and morality. **"A Close Observer"** depicts Van Astorbilk Murray, an amateur actor experiencing financial reverses who volunteers to "elevate the professional stage" for $50/night, then accepts $3/week—satirizing pretentious amateurs and economic desperation in theater.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
OOH “WANT A SHINE, Boss?” “LT pox't know, Do I nee 17?” COULDN'T AFFORD TO REFORM. B EVOL T OLD G TLEMAN: I'm sorry to see you smoking cigarettes. Boy: Some I. Cigars is too high though. UDL Shears. “ood morning, Mr. I have a little tale, mR: A little tale, eh? \ always thought you would tu. ut to be the Missing Link. said the colored cher, “let us pray for the people on the uninhabited por- tions of the earth.” * LIFE: THE LAY OF THE ANCIENT CORYPHEE. T is an ancient ballet-girl, And she stoppeth one of three : “By thy long, sharp nose and sunken eye, Now, wherefore stop’st thou me? “The strong stage doors are opened wide, And I am going in; The music sounds, the scene is set— May’st hear the merry din.” She holds him with her skinny hand ; “There was a Co.” quoth she— “Hold off! Unhand me, ancient dame, Or I'll be late, you see!” She holds him with her glittering eye; The sickly dude stands still, And listens like a patient child— The old girl has her will. The dude sat on an oaken bench— He cannot choose but hear— And thus spoke on the ancient dame As she eyed him with a leer: Nigh twenty years ago, young man, The ‘Black Crook’ was the rage; The coryphées of riper years Assembled on the stage. “Ah, boy! we were a merry lot, And gayly danced each night; The bald-head row was always filled, The house was never light. “‘And in that merry throng of swells Your father often sat; Aye, and bis aged father, too! We all can swear to that. “Of course, the swells were there in force ; They stamped and cheered and yelled ; And when at last the play was done, Wine-spreads were ofttimes held.” Then the old dame heaved a sigh, And tear stained was her cheek ; The sickly dude, impatient still, Cried, ‘* Speak, old woman, speak!" “One word and I have done,” she said, “Tt pains me much, I say, ‘That the modern dude, unlike his dad, Should neglect the coryphée. “It is the same old show to-night, The same old girls, ‘tis true; We caper and we pose and dance Much as we used to do. “Tis half-past eight—I soon go on; But one thing you should know: The times are changed, my mild young man, From twenty years ago.” Clarence Hyde. Mk. Vas ASTORBILK MURRAY, THE DIsTIN- GUISHED AMATEUR ACTOR, HAVING ENCOUNTERED FINANCIAL REVERSES, DECIDES THAT HE ‘WOULD NE WILLING TO ELEVATE THE PR* FESSIONAL STAGE FOR $50 A NIGHT. AFTER SIX MONTHS’ EFFORT HE PROCURES SITUATION WHERE HE CAN ELEVATE THE PRC FESSIONAL STAGE AT A SALARY OF $3 A WEEK. A CLOSE OBSERVER. comicbooks.com