Life — October 31, 1889 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

> LI AT §cl$fo a NvLL T SEISSORS AT NvLLy A POSER. HERE'S a matter that’s troubled us greatly, And it's never been settled as yet, We should like to have some one inform us Whether Eve was a blonde or brunette. — New York Sun, CALLER: Madam, I have called for the suit of clothes which needs brushing and fixing. Lavy or House: What suit? “Your husband's Sunday suit, ma'am. down this morning.” * And he said Iwas to let you have them ?” + Yes'm.” “* Did he appear in good health and spirits?" “Why, certainly.” * Look’ and act natural?” “Of course. Why do you ask?” “Because he has been dead eighteen years, and I have some ity on the subject 1" “I=L have made a mistake, perhaps!" “Perhaps you have. The man you saw go out of here an hour ago is my brother. Good morning."--Glasgow Citizen. He called as he went FE: JUDGE: Witness, you are forty years of age ? s: Yes—alasi One gets older every day. And ce (heaving a sigh). Ab! your worship would ‘oung I was! — Flregende Blitter Kalender. 1890. My dear, that book you gave me a while ago to prop ah, it was a cruel thing to do! Really! Darling, what has happened ? Why, it was a novel by Henry James, and it put my Boston Beacon, 251 Avucustu my feet with His Wire: Avoustu feet to sleep. Pompous ENGi1sit AUTHOR: My ambition, sir, is to be buried in Westminster Abbey beside the great men of England's past. AMERICAN PERSON: Indeed! Mine is to remain alive and kick- ing among the ordinary men of America’s present.— Lowell Citizen. Tue Czar: home ? THe Czartxa: Yes, my lov Tur Czar: And my boiler- Tne Czarina: 'Tis here armor-plated overcoat. Tue Czar: Then we will start to visit our dearovitch cousinoff in Berlinowitz.—/ittsburg Chronicle, ‘Tne raid upon the London gambling houses, with its exposure of high play among the upper classes, has evoked a great deal of indi nation among those who have no weakness for the card-table, ‘I dinna mean drinking and flirting,” once remarked a Scotch elder, when defending his son against the charge of immorality ; “but gamblin' and such things as you lose money by."—argonau?, My dearovitch, have my steel trousersoff come ‘on undershirtovitch ? ikewise your chain-armor vest and A Renewable Term Policy 7 IN THE PROVIDENT SAVINGS LIFE ASSURANCE SOCIETY OF NEW YORK, HOME OFFICE, Equitable Building, No. 120 Broadway, Is the safest, least expensive and fairest contract of life insurance in the market. One-half the rates usually charged. SHEPPARD HOMANS, President and Actuary. WM, E, STEVENS, Recretary, NEW Palmer House, Chicago, Send for Prospectus or call in person. / AMORITA, J, / Wy mM si v ‘4°ROSES HE G Tribune. “Un CELEBRATED HATS, —aAND— Ladies’ Round Hats and Bonnets And The Dunlap Silk Umbrella. 178 & 180 Fifth Avenue, bet. aad & a3d Sts. and 18 Broadway, near Cortlandt St. tBr-Agencies in all Principal Cities. Gold Medal Awarded, ™ Thoro SAT, | indorsement of public enthu: JOHN H. PRAY, SONS & C0. Woodstock Carpets are presented to the public, as filling the requirements of an ARTISTIC RUG AT A MODERATE PRICE. They are of English manufacture, and are woven in one piece in a great variety of sizes. The designs are largely furnished by Morris & Co., of London, and the color- ings are such as will harmonize in the pres- ent style of interior decoration. The GENUINE ENGLISH WOODSTOCKS Can be purchased only from JOHN H. PRAY, SONS & CO. SOLE ACENTS FOR THE U.8. YORK. org Chestnut St., Phila. Paris Exposition, 1889, Every Ev'ngat 8.15, Avoustin Daty’s New Farcicat, Commpy SREAT UNKNOW! beyond all doubt.’ bly entertaining: Sun. Heartiest m. qualified success. are entirely new and exquisite odors. Hellotrope, Jockey Club and White Rose are establieh old favoriten Stearns’ Fine Perfumes include these and many othe which areabeotutely unequaled in fragrance, permanence and Drugwists at We. per ounce, or mailed direct ov re- celptof price. Just a “whitt” of any odor for é. in stamp: F, STEARNS & CO., DET-OIT, M.CH. is the Soclety The St. Augustine News Journal fa’ excellence of the South, Its clientele places it in the froot rank as an Advertising Mediam. Address: F.G. Ranwy, General Office, Utica, N.V. parse Ae i ae GEO. MATHER’S SONS| , The cigarettes of all being hand-made, of the c DECORATION Furwiture Curtains 33 FIFTH AVE. “Ew vore Correspondence Especially Invited. 658 & 560 Washington Street, Boston. 113 Worth Street, New York. New York Bra. ~h for Wholesale only. SULLIVAN, POWELL & CO., LONDON. ORIENTAL CIGARETTES. manufactured by this firm possess the great advantage oicest and most fragrant Oriental To- RINTI NG _INK |baccos, and rolled in paper of the finest quality. 60 JOHN STREET, N. Y, THIS PAPER IS PRINTED WITH OUR SPECIAL - LIFE - INK To be had of all first-class dealers, or of the sole agents. DRUMMOND & FISKE, 24 State Street, New York City. SAMPLES AND PRICES ON APPLICATION.