Life — October 31, 1889 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ETIQUETTE, ETC. ELEN W. inquire if, in New York, society prescribes any limit to the n woman may eat at a bean pari etiquette does not rece shape, or manner, of Beacon street, Boston, writes to nber of plates of ice cream a young No; New York ize bean parties in any way, « * * M T-NNER: Yes, you man who loses both legs in the service of his country deserves well of the people ; but the frequency case is a hard one, A with which you shot off your mouth last summer has laid you open to the suspicion of having shot off your “ own legs. Such a course would invalidate even an accident insurance policy ° . * Wor o's Fate: Not by a— site, . * * MITHERS: Your idea for a cartoon is very, very funny—so funny that we feel sure that should we publish it our readers would all die a-laughing at it, which, you will observe, would be a bad th us. Your poem is charming—indeed, when Thack- eray first published it in Punch in '53 we said we thought it would outlive much of his other writing, The items you send we have decided to hold until we hear from the heirs of Theodore Hook and Douglas PIONSIUIP OF DIS WARD, AN I DON'T WANT NO KICKIN’, DO YER UNDERSTA EVERY TIME VER LOSES AN INNIN’, CLUB DER UMPIRE, AN’ DON'T YER FORGIT IT! oan: Parishioner: DeacoN, 1 DOAN HAB MUCH PAITH IN. DAT MINISTER WOT YO' GOT Fo" OUR CHURCH FROM DEOWN SMYRNA; HE HAS DUN PRAYED FO" RAIN FOR FO’ WI 3 AND NOT A DRAP MAS FELLED YET. Deacon: Ves, BRE'R WILLYUMS, BUT IT HAR RAINED POW'FUL HARD AT SMYRNA AN’ I GUESS DE LAWD HAB DUN FO'GOTTEX DAT DE MINISTER HAB CHANGED HIS PLACE OB RESIDENCE, Jerrold, who may possibly object to our ‘paying you forthem. We are happy to find your postage stamps available, and beg to say that we shall at all times be glad to receive others of the same or higher denominations from you. * ISS HENRIETTA MON s It will give us great pleasure to inform the public that you have returned from Sara- toga, where you were considered the most beautiful belle of the season. We will also accede to your request in regard to your new book of verses, and state that it is full of passion of the right sort and better than anything we have read since Keats's time; but a cast-iron rule of our office requires that nice things of this nature, said by re- quest, must appear in our advertising columns, for which a neat but not gaudy initiation fee is charged, Rates furnished upon application, . . . se HY is it considered bad form to ask for two plates of soup asks Miss Marvinthaler, of St. Louis. Be- cause soup is very filling, and it is not good form to absorb so much consommé at the start that the hors d’avres, entrées, flap-jacks and sorbets that follow are confronted with the sign, ‘Standing Room Only.” when dinin, JERSEY TRAITS. ITY GIRL (on the férm): Isn't that red cow over there a Jersey, Uncle? UNCLE HAyseeED: Nc, indeed. that’s a Jersey cow? City Girt: Well, it doesn’t seem to care about the mosquitoes and flies as much as the other cows do. She seems to be used to the’ 1. What makes ye think comicbooks.com