Life — September 12, 1889 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE AT SESORS A WL EAR KATE: By this mail I advance To you the remnants of my pants. There’s just the waist band and one leg Which you'll accept with love, I beg. It may be when you find the rest They'll make your brother Tim a vest. The shreds I send are very slight, Your pa’s dog got the rest last night. Omaha World. “Wuy are you so bitter towards her, Carrie?” “Well, you see, she heard that Harry was going to propose to me, and she spoke to me about it, and asked if I thought he intended to do so.” “Yes.” “I wanted to make her think that I didn't care anything about a proposal, so I said that if he did propose he would find himself in the soup.” 153 Fonp Mamma: Come here, darling. What have you been play- ing with ? DARLING : Don't wemember. Foxp Mama: Your hands are perfectly covered with dust. DarLinc : I dot de dust off dat big book. Foxp MaMa: Why, I declare the child has been playing with the family Bible.— America, “ LauRa,” said the young lady's mother, not unkindly, “it seems to me that you had the gas turned rather low last evening.” “It was solely for economy, mamma,” answered the maiden, “There is no use trying to beat the gas company, my daughter. T have noticed that the shutting off of the gas is always followed by a corresponding increase of pressure." “Well, that lessens the waist, doesn’ the artless girl. And her fond parent could find no more to say.— Zx. MINISTER: I'm sorry to see, my little boy, that you have been fishing, and this Sunday. Boy: Hain’t got no other time, week in Linen & Lawn's store. MINISTER: But don’t you know it is sinful to go fishing on Sunday ? Boy Mi: it, mamma, dear ?” replied I've got ter yell ‘‘cash” all the Don't care. Hain’t got no other time, I tell you. TER: It is sad to see such depravity in ‘one so young. Have “Yes.” “She went and told him what I said, and he proposed to her, and she accepted him on the spot.” “*So it’s you that’s in the soup, then?” “1 _ttT guess so '— Boston Courter. you ever been to Sunday-school ? Boy: Yes, Christmas and picnic time. MINISTER : Don't you wish to go to a better place some i the pew Jerusalem ? 2 : Guess not. I live in Boston,—Boston Courier. Packer’s ‘Tar Soap + , ‘Bland, lathering readily, and in odor recalls the breath of balsamic woods, A Hygienic Luxury, promoting a clear, soft, smooth skin, healthful scalp and vig- orous hair. 25c. Druggists. “Invaluable for Summer Rashes.” PERFUMES EDENIA oya ‘Lily. corvniaurnp. CELEBRATED HATS AND LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. 914 Chestnut St., Phila, A Cent’s Worth 10f Metcalf’s Sachet Pow- ders will perfume for years the articles to which it may be attached, so pure and permanent is the fra- grance. Send 2c. for sam- ple glass jar of Violette, Heliotrope, or Geranium, with full directions for preparing sachets, T. METCALF & CO. 39 aaa ce Boston, Sold by all Druggists. SECOND EDITION Now Reapy! The Last American. By J. A. MITCHELL, (ep1ToR oF *LirR.”) “<A fragment from the Journal of Khan- li, Prince of Dimph-yoo-Chur and Admiral in the Persian Navy.” An amusing and satirical account of the adventures of a party of Persian explorers among the ruins of America, in the year 2g51 A. D, With numerous clever illustrations by the author. ‘Well printed on good paper, and bound in dark blue cloth stamped in inks and gold, with design representing the ruins of New York City, as seen from its harbor by moonlight. 16mo, $1.00. “One of the brightest things of the sort that has appeared for many a day. . e The illustrations are as witty as the text.” —Boston BEAcon. Published by F. A. STOKES & BRO., 182 Fifth Avenue, NEW YORK. HAVE YOU EVER TRIED ““Whiting’s Standard Paper?” to be in good form in their correspondence. Sold by all dealers. and smooth finish. for it. It is used by all who desire Made in rough Ask your stationer New York Offices, 150 and 152 Duane St. comicbooks.com