Life — May 23, 1889 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

306 ROYAL REGRETS. HE ladies and gentlemen engaged in the monarchy p oy TT SEY TR trade in Europe are not attending the Paris Exposition peal Be wor Berar Oren , P J & Gaane 17th, very numerously. It commemorates the opening of the q PW cor Wit Oona t MOR. States General one hundred years ago, and as that body pontytocnee uP 17 you wasn § - ; ie : : - Fo ontw TAL SUE He CON indulged in pernicious activity which the Kings and Queens 4 equation 1 16 2u F-30 do not approve, they consider that it would be in bad taste 7 : to visit the French capital now. A few replies to the invitations to be present are appended, From Queen Victoria: “1 cawn't come to your exhibition, doncher know. Thanks awfully for the invitation, but I really must look after Beatrice’s husband a little more closely, doncher know.” From the Czar of Russia: “1 regretoff my absenceovitch from your showoff, but am compelledoff to decline your invitationvitch you so kindly sent, because my new spring- steel suitoff has not come from the tailorvitch.” From the King of Italy: “Shall notta be able to be presenta. V sorra, but cyclona and potato-bug famina in South Africa have unsettled my nervesa, so that I cannot indulge in foreign travela.” From the Emperor of Germany: “Mein liddle poy von bat colt has, und I stay der heim at, to tend to dot poy, don’t “Say, Jim, THAT'S WHAT I CALLS THOUGHTFUL AND CoNsID- , 5 See ERATE. ‘THE FELLER WHAT WROTE THAT IS A BRICK AN’ A Wm, H. Siviter, Gixtvemast™ HE WAS NOT SUR- PRISED. ~QUIRE OATCAKE (reading the paper): I see that there are red ants at the White House. MRS. OATCAKE: Dear, dear! Red aunts! Mr. Har- rison has a great many rela- tives, but I didn’t know there s injuns among ‘em. THE FINAL GOAL. HE REV. DR. HIGH- CHURCH: James, do you know where good little boys go to when they grow up? SMALL JAMES BROWN- STONE: Yes, sir. They get in the 400. A JERY interesting sight is to watch a minister * try to open a car window. The dramatic effect comes He: MY RUBBERS, from what he doesn’t say. HER FIRST SPRING IN NEW JERSEY. She: Gooo GRactous! GFORGCE, WHAT IS ALL THAT? comicbooks.com