Life — June 21, 1888 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE’S TIPS. ACING is now at its height, and Lire would be neglecting its readers if it did not give them a few useful hints pertaining to the royal sport. In the first place, plunging is very bad form, particularly for clerks whose weekly salary does not exceed seven dollars. Such vulgarity as winning $15,000 on one day's races may safely be left to Pittsburg Phil and his pro- fessional associates. In accepting tips, weigh well your information. Look into the pedigree and record of your informant. Ascertain whether any of his ancestors were ever convicted of perjury, and secure written evidence connecting him with some reliable church. Then listen carefully to the tip and immediately go and lay your money on another horse. Young women should always pretend ignorance of the horses in a race. Even if a girl does know all about them, most men who lose gloves, candy and other luxuries, may be depended-upon to pay up without any jogging of memory. On the other hand, if a girl is prettily igno- rant of the fact that the horse she has backed has finished in the race a bad nowhere, few men are so brutal as to enlighten her ignorance by dunning for the wager. At the end of the season this ignorance will have made quite a saving for the girl who practices it properly. People who are ignorant of racing might be inclined to think that book-making was a literary industry. It is not. It might, however, be called a pursuit, the object of which is the five-dollar bills of the unwary. “The race is not always to the swift” is a very estimable proverb, but in racing you will, nevertheless, find it a good rule to place your money on the swiftest horse. Among the books that will help you in the study of this subject you will find valuable “The New Anthropology, or the Changes in Modern Races” and “ Race Tendencies in North America.” The Dwyer Brothers attribute their success to the careful and frequent perusal of these standard works. When on the grand-stand and in the hearing of ladies, see that your conversa- tion is plentifully sprinkled with racing terms, as it will create a favorable impression. “Very fit,” “Garrison's up now,” “I'll give you an air-tight ” and similar expressions will be found most effective, particularly if you carry a field-glass strapped over your shoulder. Scatter tips indiscriminately, whether you know anything about the horses or not. If they prove wrong, they're no worse ‘than other tips, and if by any chance one should prove right, you will gain the reputation of being a very knowing fellow indeed. If you happen to be present on one of the days when a short horse pays $545.62, you will find it advantageous to tell your friends how near you came to buying one of those tickets. Such stories always command attention, and you will find yourself listened to with respect. Finally, read carefully the racing news in the daily papers. You may not be able to tell a fetlock from a handicap, but you will be able to talk learnedly of the odds for future events, and this is more than enough to gain you a reputation as a racing man. Metcalfe. 4 A YOUNG WIFE'S FIRST 'CAKES, AND WHAT THEY ACCOM- PLISHED. comicbooks.com